Doctors notes

[Hockey #1]

A physician claimed that the following are actual
comments made by his patients (predominately male)
while he was performing their colonoscopy:
1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no
man has gone before!"
2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there
yet?"

5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally
married."
6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left
hand out..."
8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"

10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't
you?"

12. "God, Now I know why I am not gay."

And the best one of them all...

13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my
head is not up there."