Student Forced To Cover Scars

[Fancy]

Ten years is a drop in the bucket. What about the trend 40 years ago

[Xmenenslaver]

As a former cutter myself, I definitely think it is inappropriate for the school to shame a person who is obviously ashamed enough of themselves that they feel the need to hurt themself. People who self harm generally don't know how to ask for help in their lives and are actually hoping someone sees and asks what is wrong. That was always what I wanted when i was going through that.

[mysideofthings]

I struggled with self harm as a teenager and for many years after. A teacher and a friend on two separate occasions noticed the cuts/scars at school. It was already known about at that point by my parents though, and I was getting help. My principal dealt with it appropriately though. While I was embarrassed and ashamed and tried to keep them covered, it wasn't always possible, and I didn't want them to be noticed/made a big deal about. But the truth is that if it wasn't known about already, it would have been important that it was because I was struggling so much. It became an addiction for me. I didn't want to do it but couldn't stop. I didn't do it for attention either, and I didn't do it as part of a trend. That was back in the mid/late 90s when it was just becoming known about. I knew only a few others who did it also, which was helpful for me because I didn't feel so alone.

I do find it important to note though that self harm does NOT necessarily mean someone is suicidal. While they can sometimes co exist, it doesn't mean that they do in every case. Self harm is a coping skill that actually often helps keep them alive instead of ending/attempting to end their life if they are suicidal. At least, that was how it was for me.

Schools should be making sure that appropriate resources are available at school and that the person struggling is getting help outside of school as well.

I don't feel like making someone cover scars in this situation was appropriate. It takes a hell of a lot of courage for someone who has self harmed usually to even have them uncovered to begin with. If it was actually fresh cuts, which would be way different, then I would understand the reasoning behind that.

[kgcayenne]

Self harm is not always as visible as cutting, either. Think about that for a moment.

[Osoyoos_Familyof4]

This is a very complicated issue and there are perhaps variabłes here that aren't obvious:

In certain treatment centres, there is special attention to be aware of people who self harm in a manner which is socially-compulsive. Bottom line is that kids who do this sometimes can influence and encourage other vulnerabłe kids to act out in a similar fashion. You may find that some children's peer group will bond around this negative behaviour.

The unknown factors here are plenty. Is the child still actively self-harming in a way which is obvious in that it may trigger others? Are there others in this particular student's peer-group who are struggling themselves to resist the urge to cut? Are there other students who are completely having their own anxiety at being in close proximity to this young-woman?

A school must look after the emotional needs of the community at large, and we just don't know what we're missing here.

For the record, I think the school bungled this completely. However sometimes in the moment it can be one person in the office who spoke about hiding the scars without really considering that the request isn't (or is?) reasonable.

Some people have stated that they feel "addicted" to cutting. It is an emotional coping mechanism, so it seems reasonable that there may be some people who feel triggered to "want" to do this themselves when they witness this girls's scars?

Again I am playing devil's advocate here because I think any school really struggles to recognize that every student is unique, but sometimes it's about the emotional safety of all.

[totoramona]

I am outraged. This is discrimination against mental illness and implies that it is both shameful and "contagious". There is no evidence to suggest that forcing a student to cover the "evidence" of a mental health issue is an emotionally safe message to send to all of the other students! I wonder what psychologists' opinion on this is. Further, I have never heard of a school enforcing the coverage of scars from any other illness or disease under threat of expulsion.

Young loved ones in my family have dealt with mental illness while going through the school system and they ended up with emotional scars from the teachers, principals and the system itself. There was no room within the system to support and encourage them while overcoming their issues, which by the way, were of absolutely no consequence to the other students. They were instead further hurt and distressed by uninformed staff, unrealistic expectations and unnecessarily rigid rules. School staff at all levels refused to follow the simple small changes proposed by our own mental health professionals; changes that involved no cost and would have made a world of difference. In the end, our only choice was to leave.

I dearly hope the family of this student will pursue this issue with the school board. But a family dealing with a child with mental health issues is unlikely to have either the energy or desire to take on a bureaucratic battle at the same time.

My heart goes out to this girl and her family.

[GordonH]

This is an issue that needs to come out of the shadows, been there far to long. Those with any number of mental health issues including self harming need to feel they are accepted, not rejected (forcing them to cover up because it makes you uncomfortable is not the acceptance they need).

Mental health issues in this country still have long way to go, Lets Talk needs to be a daily event.

[one wheel]

My heart goes out to that young girl. It took tremendous courage to say what you did with the stress you live with. To the students of Penticton Secondary - thank you all - you might never know just how uplifting you became by giving your support & showing her friendship in such a time of need. I hope you never have to go through another day like that Friday ever.

[totoramona]

School staff at all levels need to be educated that mental illness is not a character flaw.

Depression is not laziness.
Anxiety is not defiance.
And self harm is not attention seeking.

Their ignorance is extremely hurtful.

[Fancy]

I wouldn't be basing an opinion solely on one article. Quotes are not always accurate and it is one sided. Assuming school staff thinks mental illness is a character flaw is a great disservice to those that could very well have mental illness in their own families.

[kgcayenne]

Notes from the field:

Open dialogue needed
Contributed - Feb 6, 2018 / 10:00 am | Story: 218131
As a mental health practitioner who specializes in helping adolescents overcome Non-Suicidal Self-Injury (NSSI), I was appalled to read of a SD 67 School Board ruling “ordering a grade nine student to wear long sleeves at all times to cover scars” on February 5, 2018. It is short sighted and puritanical actions like this that continue to vilify those struggling with mental health issues, resulting in those who need help being fearful of reaching out for it. On the flip-side, I am heartened by the wise and outspokenness of the students who are standing up to this repulsive action.

NSSI is a process mostly used to counter overwhelming emotional and physical distress and only ‘works’ for 16.9% of the population. A smaller percentage use it to escape feelings of dissociation or depersonalization; feeling numb physically and emotionally. Most importantly, 50% use it to avoid suicide, so in many cases NSSI is the only thing keeping them alive, it is not ‘contagious’. In her longitudinal study of self-injury, Dr Mary Kay Nixon of the University of Victoria found that 72% of adolescents who self-injure believe they came up with the idea on their own, while under 10% learned of it through friends, family or television.

Mental health issues are one of the largest crises our society faces today, with 25% of children and adolescents developing an anxiety or mood disorder in their school years. Our school board needs to wake up to the fact that right now among the 4000+ population of their students between the ages of 12-18 years, 680 are engaging in NSSI and will do so for an average of 21 months; 286 will continue into adulthood and 8 will complete suicide within 15 years of the onset of self-injury. Only an open dialogue without shame or judgement can help these students come forward to ask for the help they may need.
We look to our educational authorities such as SD 67 to provide education based on current and best practice; to be leaders in the field of helping our young people navigate life; to nurture and promote inclusivity amongst our student population. Certainly not to vilify and shame a young woman for doing her best to cope. I applaud the students who are leading the charge to change the outdated and harmful attitudes of SD 67 administrators, and remind them of the words of cultural anthropologist Margaret Mead;

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.”

http://www.castanet.net/news/Letters/21 ... gue-needed

[totoramona]

Thank-you for sharing the above letter kgcayenne !!
I hope we can hear more professionals weighing in on this matter.
My family had the painful experience of school teachers and administrators failing to follow advice and direction from the mental health field. Maybe policy will change as a result of this current situation.

[Bsuds]

Maybe policy will change as a result of this current situation.

Unfortunately it seems to be very difficult to open closed minds.

[Fancy]

School boards have policy in place - may be time for an update considering there doesn't seem to be a difference between self-harm and suicide.

[totoramona]

School boards have policy in place - may be time for an update considering there doesn't seem to be a difference between self-harm and suicide.

I am not aware of school board policy relating to self harm, apparent suicide attempts or clothing worn that must cover the evidence of such.

I am also not aware of school board policy relating to mental health or illness in general, other than that of high level vision or mission statements which promote support, nurturing and inclusiveness.

I agree that there needs to be an update and/or new policy that ensures that students dealing with mental illness are supported and accommodated so that they do not have to choose between properly managing their illness and receiving an education with their peers.