Double Fatal

[OnTheRoadAgain]

Unfortunately by the time they are teens , it is already too late. The job starts much earlier in life. They have arrive at puberty already knowing right from wrong , already having self respect and self discipline , already understanding that life is fragile , already making good decisions instead of bad , thinking about the future instead of the right now. This sounds like some Utopian dream , but I personally know some teens who are benefiting from their upbringing right now. For them , my only real concern lies with "the other guy". Unfortunately I also know some teens who are "the other guy"

IT's easier when they are younger for sure.
But still, with strong willed children, they will find a way to do what they want regardless.
Especially when they are teenagers facing peer pressure to belong to the group.
Self respect, self discipline, both come with maturity.
Upbringing doesn't guarantee anything really, just gives the kid better chances.

[gordon_as]

Agree totally. The need to feel accepted , or to be part of the group had sent many down the wrong path.

[shelly01]

So interesting how speculation becomes fact. I don't recall from the original story that anyone involved was 15 or that this accident happened after midnight. With so much pain and hurt surrounding this tragedy, it seems disrespectful to embellish the story with misinformation. Family and friends could be reading this....please remember that.

[prairieflower]

II shake my head at this too but it's pretty hard to stop them if they really want to, they will find a way.

I call BS on this.....if you tell your teen that they are NOT going out, they are NOT going out!!!! Simple folks.

You are the parent, not them. Take away their phones, lap tops, computers.

It is time to realise that the parents have the rights, not the kids. My God, what is this world turning into when the child, yes child, tells the parent what they are going to be doing?????

My heart breaks for these young people, children and their families.........I hope I as a parent, never have to have that knock on the door or phone call, no matter how old my children will be.

[Fancy]

How do you stop them? Sit on them?

[the truth]

Unfortunately by the time they are teens , it is already too late. The job starts much earlier in life. They have arrive at puberty already knowing right from wrong , already having self respect and self discipline , already understanding that life is fragile , already making good decisions instead of bad , thinking about the future instead of the right now. This sounds like some Utopian dream , but I personally know some teens who are benefiting from their upbringing right now. For them , my only real concern lies with "the other guy". Unfortunately I also know some teens who are "the other guy"

well said
to bad so many people only care about these types of kids after there dead

[grammafreddy]

They only care briefly ... and then life happens and the kids go about their former ways and parents keep on being friends instead of parents, aiding and abetting more kids and innocent bystanders to die.

Every teen's death is just a moment in time ... a 9-day wonder.

It's a cycle that repeats itself over and over.

[the truth]

How do you stop them? Sit on them?

really? last time i checked i was in charge of my teenage kids
must be why they are all doing great

[the truth]

They only care briefly ... and then life happens and the kids go about their former ways and parents keep on being friends instead of parents, aiding and abetting more kids and innocent bystanders to die.

Every teen's death is just a moment in time ... a 9-day wonder.

It's a cycle that repeats itself over and over.

you got it

[Fancy]

really? last time i checked i was in charge of my teenage kids
must be why they are all doing great

You have totally missed the point. Your kids obviously aren't a problem. 16/17 year olds who hold down jobs, are becoming more independent and want to go out for a fun night. If there are problems in the home, you can bet you can say no all you want and they will find a way around it. Sneak out, fib, but at the end of the day, there are those who are determined enough to defy a parent, and they will. My question is still valid.

[OnTheRoadAgain]

II shake my head at this too but it's pretty hard to stop them if they really want to, they will find a way.

I call BS on this.....if you tell your teen that they are NOT going out, they are NOT going out!!!! Simple folks.

You are the parent, not them. Take away their phones, lap tops, computers.

It is time to realise that the parents have the rights, not the kids. My God, what is this world turning into when the child, yes child, tells the parent what they are going to be doing?????

My heart breaks for these young people, children and their families.........I hope I as a parent, never have to have that knock on the door or phone call, no matter how old my children will be.

Hi, I have lots of questions for you, if you have the time, and energy.

Do you have teenagers yourself?
Do you have adult children?
Have you been in need with your children to try these measures to confirm that they work?
Do you think they might work with some kids, but not with others, depending on personalities, etc.
Do you realize in the past three decades, especially the past decade, that parents have lost all rights to information about their children (medical/legal) through the Federal Privacy Act?

I'm grew up more decades ago than that. There were teenagers back then telling their parents what they were going to do and what they were not going to do. Back then kids quit school before they graduated, they did drugs, they drove fast in cars, (there were no seatbelts), and kids drank at bush parties and in friends basements. If you didn't do that, you were in the chess club or reading club. If you did do that, you were in with the cool kids, who had an exciting, fun-charged, party good time, if you were allowed, or if you were able to sneak out of your house after the parents went to bed - or better yet, plan a sleepover with your friend who is allowed to go out, because when your mom calls her mom, her mom will say yup, I'm gonna be home, and it's all good, (until the single mom gets a call to go out and leaves the kids on their own, at least her DD has a sleepover guest so she won't be alone...)

My parents lost a 17 year old son. I lost a 17 year old brother. (ETA: no alcohol involved, good kid from good family, good friends, drove too fast.)
Time may help to focus on the good memories, but he will always be missed, and we will never be the same. Ever. We are all good, living very blessed lives, but our family, and each of us will never be the same without him. I feel so much empathy for the parents, that it hurts to read the blame on them.

We should all teach our kids that freedom of speech comes with responsibility, indeed, any right comes with responsibility.

[LoneWolf_53]

II shake my head at this too but it's pretty hard to stop them if they really want to, they will find a way.

I call BS on this.....if you tell your teen that they are NOT going out, they are NOT going out!!!! Simple folks.

You are the parent, not them. Take away their phones, lap tops, computers.

It is time to realise that the parents have the rights, not the kids. My God, what is this world turning into when the child, yes child, tells the parent what they are going to be doing?????

My heart breaks for these young people, children and their families.........I hope I as a parent, never have to have that knock on the door or phone call, no matter how old my children will be.

Speaking as a parent I can't help but feel that you haven't had to deal with any teenagers of your own yet.

Your points are easy enough to write down, but try seeing how simple they are to execute.

Our system has empowered youth, far beyond what any of the previous generations had experienced, they know it, and if so inclined will use it to their advantage.

[Bretbaby]

You are the parent, not them. Take away their phones, lap tops, computers.

It is time to realise that the parents have the rights, not the kids. My God, what is this world turning into when the child, yes child, tells the parent what they are going to be doing?????

My heart breaks for these young people, children and their families.........I hope I as a parent, never have to have that knock on the door or phone call, no matter how old my children will be.

really? last time i checked i was in charge of my teenage kids
must be why they are all doing great

FINALLY, thank you for these great posts!!

Speaking as a parent I can't help but feel that you haven't had to deal with any teenagers of your own yet.

Your points are easy enough to write down, but try seeing how simple they are to execute.

Our system has empowered youth, far beyond what any of the previous generations had experienced, they know it, and if so inclined will use it to their advantage.

Why aren't they simple to execute? What happens when you tell your teenager they have to stay home tonight?

[Dash5]

Speaking as a parent I can't help but feel that you haven't had to deal with any teenagers of your own yet.

Your points are easy enough to write down, but try seeing how simple they are to execute.

Our system has empowered youth, far beyond what any of the previous generations had experienced, they know it, and if so inclined will use it to their advantage.

Well said.

[Bsuds]

II shake my head at this too but it's pretty hard to stop them if they really want to, they will find a way.

I call BS on this.....if you tell your teen that they are NOT going out, they are NOT going out!!!! Simple folks.

You are the parent, not them. Take away their phones, lap tops, computers.

It is time to realise that the parents have the rights, not the kids. My God, what is this world turning into when the child, yes child, tells the parent what they are going to be doing?????

My heart breaks for these young people, children and their families.........I hope I as a parent, never have to have that knock on the door or phone call, no matter how old my children will be.

You have no clue do you and I hope you never have a problem teen because in the end you have no power!