And she just walked away ,,,

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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby WalterWhite » Dec 2nd, 2017, 9:22 pm

Other than one’s own satisfaction of taking their business elsewhere - if they even shopped there previously, boycotting does little to nothing. Especially if it’s a meager couple of posters receiving the info to act on via pm on a message board. Look at the levels of importance of men that are currently being felled by women finally coming forward about past transgressions. The only way to stop this sort of behaviour is to make them accountable for their actions by bringing it to light, even more so if there’s clear indication it’s not an isolated incident. Never mind hitting them in their pocket books - hit ‘em where they deserve it - right in the balls.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby heycarmelina » Dec 3rd, 2017, 2:23 am

I haven't had a job where I wasn't sexually harassed in one form or the other. I do understand why women won't come forward. People need to start believing women and calling out harassers. The cycle won't end until more people stand up.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby LANDM » Dec 3rd, 2017, 9:10 am

I don’t understand why......and truly do not understand, so please don’t take this as something against the OP's wife.......she has chosen not to pursue this in any way. I know that it would be difficult, so is that the reason?

I repeat, I’m not victim blaming or anything else remotely like that. I just don’t get it totally from the OP.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Raven1 » Dec 3rd, 2017, 10:01 am

LANDM wrote:I don’t understand why......and truly do not understand, so please don’t take this as something against the OP's wife.......she has chosen not to pursue this in any way. I know that it would be difficult, so is that the reason?

I repeat, I’m not victim blaming or anything else remotely like that. I just don’t get it totally from the OP.



Pretty simple I think.....
She wants to get on with her life and not put anymore energy into a very traumatic time of her life.

For every action, there is a reaction and contrary to popular belief that reaction isn't always retaliation.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Sige » Dec 3rd, 2017, 10:26 am

So her replacement will walk into the exact same situation with no warning.

It's a vicious cycle and I guess the only way for it to stop is for it to happen to a woman who is more concerned with wrongdoing and other women being abused than not putting any more energy into a traumatic time in her life.

Hopefully someone will eventually be the former or it will continue endlessly.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Raven1 » Dec 3rd, 2017, 10:36 am

And it would be up to her replacement to react in the way he/she found appropriate.

Who is any of us to tell another how they should or shouldn't react?
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Sige » Dec 3rd, 2017, 10:39 am

I didn't tell anyone how they "should" react. I was simply stating the obvious.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby LANDM » Dec 3rd, 2017, 11:02 am

Raven1 wrote:
LANDM wrote:I don’t understand why......and truly do not understand, so please don’t take this as something against the OP's wife.......she has chosen not to pursue this in any way. I know that it would be difficult, so is that the reason?

I repeat, I’m not victim blaming or anything else remotely like that. I just don’t get it totally from the OP.



Pretty simple I think.....
She wants to get on with her life and not put anymore energy into a very traumatic time of her life.

For every action, there is a reaction and contrary to popular belief that reaction isn't always retaliation.


Yes, I get that.....and I am NOT suggesting anything like your "popular belief". I have made similar decisions many times, although totally different situations.

However, since the OP was the one that, by definition, originally posted this, it would be interesting to hear if your interpretation is, in fact, the correct one.

When one posts here, they are obviously asking for some responses.....I am simply asking for clarification
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Queen K » Dec 3rd, 2017, 11:07 am

The only thing I can think of is that the former boss is in fact the lynch pin to the company and many people will lose good jobs if he's taken down.

And the OP's wife doesn't want to be responsible for people who have debt obligations and living expenses to be taken down.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby generalposter » Dec 3rd, 2017, 11:41 am

Two choices...fight or flight. She has no obligations to anyone but herself. Her and her families well being are the priority.

She was undoubtedly physically and mentally exhausted from the experience with no energy left to do anything but break free. It will take years to recover from the experience as it also involved her career which for many people is their primary identity. The sooner she frees herself of the circumstances the sooner she will be well again. She made a smart decision.
Someone has to say it.

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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby artistwithaflare » Dec 3rd, 2017, 12:05 pm

Its been my experience that when you do speak up...it comes back to bite you in the *bleep*!
All of a sudden your co-workers want no part of it or you. Even though they voiced their dislike of the abuse in privacy.
Conditioning they got throughout the years makes them look the other way...
Terrible bosses, supervisor's, and employees eventually gain a reputation they can't hide or quit from.
Just say it as it is!
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Fancy » Dec 3rd, 2017, 8:15 pm

buteman wrote:I firmly believe that sexual harassment in the workplace is much more prevalent than most of us realize. In my opinion individuals that don't come forward do so simply because they need their jobs.
Those of us that have had to live with sexual harassment because we want our jobs know how common it is. I've found the younger generation don't put up with it as much as their motherly figures and good for them. Times are changing but any flippant comment about "yea go for it and put them in their place" doesn't really fly in the real world. This isn't Hollywood. Smaller communities can really suffer and the implications are huge if one steps up. Yes, one can get fired and does one want to go there and will they still be able to keep their head up high? It's not just about fellow employees either - when children are involved, the stakes can be high.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby buteman » Dec 4th, 2017, 4:28 am

I am the O.P. a question was raised " don't understand why " ,,,, I will presume that the course of action my wife took is why this question has been raised. I can only advise my wife and perhaps offer suggestions. Information that we have received indicates that my wife would certainly be entitled to E.I. benefits. Individual who quit their jobs can be eligible for benefits providing that there is an acceptable reason for terminating their employment.

My wife walking away was her choice and her choice alone and she was certainly entitled to make that decision. From a financial point of view she would be able to collect approximately $ 2200.00 per month in E.I. benefits. When an individual decides to terminate their employment due to sexual harassment Service Canada ( E.I. ) investigates.

My wife's workmates would be interviewed and they would be asked if they could verify my wife's account. That in itself opens up the " can of worms " so to speak that would involve other former workmates. This is exactly what my wife is trying to avoid, there are other individuals in that workplace that are in fear of losing their jobs if they come forward.

All my wife is prepared to do would be to come forward sometime in the future if any other employee in that company terminates their employment for similar reasons. Other than that it's time to move forward, for the most part my wife is bitterly disappointed that after the years of faithful loyal service that she felt compelled to quit her job.

By the way my wife worked an average of 48 hours per week and was paid for 40 ( as were some of her workmates ). Complain and file a claim with Employment Standards and you will be looking for new employment in a heartbeat that was the attitude so put your head down and say nothing and your job is secure.

In any event i do appreciate your input, good to know what others think on certain topics. My wife and I are moving on and we will put this unhappy moment in our lives behind us. Thank you.

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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby Fancy » Dec 4th, 2017, 6:29 am

buteman wrote: My wife and I are moving on ....
The past is done and there are happy moments ahead - enjoy your life and good luck.
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Re: And she just walked away ,,,

Postby monroe » Dec 4th, 2017, 10:14 am

Curious, is the op pm'img the employers name or business name or both?

Im guessing that when the op wrote the topic, at that point no one knew the employer or the op but yet most everyone was willing to grab a pitch fork.

No one can doubt the validity of what the op is saying at all but if his wife is looking to move on, then why the post here. Are you looking for some unbiased advice as to whether you should followup with this legally? Closure?


Theres a fine line between creating awareness and causing a witch hunt.

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