Young children can't be home alone, BC judge rules

[jamapple]

Still waiting for an answer to a question I find important. Any professionals left to actually anser it??

If you forgot, or didn't see it asked 19 times.....here's the question:
How is the arbitrary removal of children from loving homes without reason a benefit to the children ???

[whatwhat]

Still waiting for an answer to a question I find important. Any professionals left to actually anser it??

If you forgot, or didn't see it asked 19 times.....here's the question:
How is the arbitrary removal of children from loving homes without reason a benefit to the children ???

I have a feeling no one has wanted to answer this question, is because anything we have written on this thread has not been actually listened too. I could easily answer this question, but no matter what I write no one will actually read, listen and try and understand what I have said. The few of you who have had your own personal experiences get defensive when talking about this subject, which I understand. So that is why I haven't bothered to response to that question.

[Smurf]

Whatwhat wrote:

I think the point of Smurf's article he posted was that we live in an individualistic society who doesn't look out for others. In eastern societies they value the whole and the group. The parent interviewed in the article was saying that if something was to happen to their children out in public, they have faith that others would come to help.

Yes, we may have to coddle our children, but is that because we live in a society, that when we see something wrong happening we just turn away?

Exactly what I was thinking. We in general do not make our public areas safe for children. They tell children to ask for help we and rightly so in our society tell them not to talk to strangers. I was hoping people would read the article and see the difference and how we would have to change our society to make it more safe. How many people on here have or would tell their children to walk up to a stranger on the street and ask for help.

jamapple wrote:
Still waiting for an answer to a question I find important. Any professionals left to actually anser it??

If you forgot, or didn't see it asked 19 times.....here's the question:
How is the arbitrary removal of children from loving homes without reason a benefit to the children ???

Although I completely agree with what whatwhat replied to this I do want to say something which I probably will regret.

I don't believe anyone on here wants to see children removed from loving homes. Having said that, what is a loving home.

Parents can love their children 100% but still brutally beat them because in their mind they are doing the right thing.

They can love them 100% but not know how to care for them properly.

They can love them 100% and still be addicts and or alcoholics and just plain not care for them.

They can love them 100% but not be able to do the right things because of circumstances and if we all knew the whole situation in the case we are discussing that might have been the case. No one knows for sure.

I would like to know how many times there are children taken out of loving homes that are actually caring for them properly as compared to the times they need to be taken away or at least helped. I will bet that the number of wrong removals is very small compared to the ones that needed to be done. However I am not the professional or expert you were asking to answer and am just giving a personal opinion.

Good luck in getting an answer though.

[MAPearce]

Exactly what I was thinking. We in general do not make our public areas safe for children. They tell children to ask for help we and rightly so in our society tell them not to talk to strangers. I was hoping people would read the article and see the difference and how we would have to change our society to make it more safe. How many people on here have or would tell their children to walk up to a stranger on the street and ask for help.

I can't say for sure that I'd condone my kids talking to strangers in general , but I do teach them to open doors for anyone with full hands , seniors and handicapped weather they know them or not.. My boy is expected to hold doors for ladies. But in circumstances when they might be in trouble , they have been taught to ask for help in public places.

Strangers on the street , behind check out counters , at gas bars , behind the wheel of busses or just walking home from work with a 6 pack of beer are people who have come from families and would help in anyway they could if they were asked by a child.

I know I would .

It's only because kids have been instilled with fear that they won't ask for help and the same fear is what prohibits everyday people from intervening in situations before a kid needs help.

"We " did this to ourselves.

[Donald G]

removed. opinions. he has one and is allowed to post it.

[MAPearce]

removed.

[Donald G]

To jamapple ...

What country did this "arbitrary removal of children from loving homes without reason" take place in ??

In my OPINION you are detached from reality if you are professing to talk about B.C.

[MAPearce]

Uh huh ... Why not ask the Kelowna dad who just recently had his two daughters taken away .. One was a mere two months shy of her 12th birthday, which is only a guide line as to how old the MCFD THINKS what is an appropriate age to be left at home alone...

Remember D , this father did his homework and knows that there is no minimum age in the law here in BC... Get that D ?

NO law. Talk about detached reality.. You can't honestly say you missed that story .

[Bsuds]

In my OPINION you are detached from reality if you are professing to talk about B.C.

Says the kettle

[Barney Google]

Although I completely agree with what whatwhat replied to this I do want to say something which I probably will regret.

I don't believe anyone on here wants to see children removed from loving homes. Having said that, what is a loving home.

Parents can love their children 100% but still brutally beat them because in their mind they are doing the right thing.

They can love them 100% but not know how to care for them properly.

They can love them 100% and still be addicts and or alcoholics and just plain not care for them.

They can love them 100% but not be able to do the right things because of circumstances and if we all knew the whole situation in the case we are discussing that might have been the case. No one knows for sure.

I would like to know how many times there are children taken out of loving homes that are actually caring for them properly as compared to the times they need to be taken away or at least helped. I will bet that the number of wrong removals is very small compared to the ones that needed to be done. However I am not the professional or expert you were asking to answer and am just giving a personal opinion.

Good luck in getting an answer though.

From my experience working with children and troubled teens and young adults what you have posted above Smurf with regards to the perception of 'loving homes' is very true. What one person or persons think is a loving home is sometimes very different from what others might perceive. And THAT is a huge problem with our 'System' in BC.

Also, to both Smurf and Jam Apple...I can only comment on the children/teens and families I have worked with and situations I have been privy to and on the Grand Scale of things that is a very miniscule percentage. I can concur that Smurf's statement of "I will bet that the number of wrong removals is very small compared to the ones that needed to be done"...is pretty true. Again, that is from my experience. What has frustrated me to no end in the past and continues to frustrate me to this very day is that there were/are too many questionable situations where children are left to live in or deal with than should be. What's equally as frustrating is that there is little to no support for these children and families to work through those difficult times together as a family before the need to separate children from their parents comes about.

[Donald G]

To Barney ...

One comment from someone like yourself, who has "been there and done that" is worth a dozen from armchair social workers with great theories and no real life experience.

[Barney Google]

To Barney ...

One comment from someone like yourself, who has "been there and done that" is worth a dozen from armchair social workers with great theories and no real life experience.

Not sure about that Donald...but thanks. There are many folks out there who have dedicated a large part of their lives helping children and their families. Many of them have been at it long before me and will continue on after I am finished.
Every single one of them are people I greatly admire and deeply respect. Maybe BC needs to start listening to a few of my colleagues who have been in the trenches for years and years and a little less to Ministry Staff who are out of touch with the realities of those whom they are supposedly the advocates of.

[jamapple]

To jamapple ...

What country did this "arbitrary removal of children from loving homes without reason" take place in ??

In my OPINION you are detached from reality if you are professing to talk about B.C.

So, you're actually saying on a public forum, that you feel no children have been both taken from a non-abusive home, nor been negatively affected by such an event in BC? Talk about detached from reality!!
Thank God it's just your opinion, and nothing that really means anything.

[Smurf]

Jamapple are you saying you expect the system to be perfect in a world where nothing is or ever will be perfect. I believe everyone on here knows mistakes have been made, the workers are human. I truly believe that the workers are doing the best they can under the circumstances, some better than others which again is normal. Hopefully any actually bad ones are being weeded out. What would be interesting to know is the ratio of bad decisions compared to the number of cases worked. Is it 1 in 10, 1 in 100, 1 in 1000 or 1 in 10,000. How many are actually hurt more than helped. Even that is difficult because there is no way of knowing what would have happened if no one would have intervened. Hopefully they are learning as they go and correct mistakes where possible. But I will say it again, no situation will ever be perfect when humans are involved and also never in everyone's eyes.

[Donald G]

To Smurf ...

That about sums it up nicely regarding most things in life that involve humans.