Castanet

Such a sad story of a life that did not need to end. Amanda deserved better. There is not enough love in the world.

What is with kids these days being so cruel to other people. I truly do not understand.

http://www.vancouversun.com/technology/ ... story.html

It is heartbreaking that she felt that was her only escape. We need to raise our kids, and set an example ourselves, that it is not OK to treat people like she went through. I will do my part by raising children that do not treat others in that matter and hopefully influence their peers to do the same.

So sad. I don't understand how people can be so cruel.

Wonder how many of those kids who bullied her are sitting there thinking, "Man, I drove her to do that!"

Wonder if they are posting "RIP, Amanda. Gonna miss you. You were such a nice girl" on the FB page ....

Very sad. My condoleances goes to her family.

grammafreddy wrote:Wonder how many of those kids who bullied her are sitting there thinking, "Man, I drove her to do that!"

Wonder if they are posting "RIP, Amanda. Gonna miss you. You were such a nice girl" on the FB page ....

I was shocked to hear that evil kids were writing unthinkable stuff on a page setup for her

I wonder how many of the kids who bullied and/or stood by while it happened are kids whose parents live in denial and have the belief that "my daughter or son wouldn't do that". We can never underestimate the power of peer pressure...heck I see it all the time in adults who bow to it. Too many parents teach their children crap like "Stay out of it...it isn't your business...it isn't your problem". How many ADULTS (not just parents) don't "do the right thing" while kids are watching? Or succumb to marketing pressure to ensure they and/or their children and/or nieces, nephews, grandchildren have all the up-to-date techno gadgets, name brand clothes, activities, vehicles etc, etc. And, how many watch crap shows where cattiness and humiliating people is normal?

We can be angry at these kids who drove this poor girl to her suicide, but we need to take a step back and ask how the hell could it get to the point where parents, teachers and administrators also did not intervene?!

My fear is this is this is only the tip of the iceberg of where this society is heading.

coffeeFreak wrote:I wonder how many of the kids who bullied and/or stood by while it happened are kids whose parents live in denial and have the belief that "my daughter or son wouldn't do that". We can never underestimate the power of peer pressure...heck I see it all the time in adults who bow to it. Too many parents teach their children crap like "Stay out of it...it isn't your business...it isn't your problem". How many ADULTS (not just parents) don't "do the right thing" while kids are watching? Or succumb to marketing pressure to ensure they and/or their children and/or nieces, nephews, grandchildren have all the up-to-date techno gadgets, name brand clothes, activities, vehicles etc, etc. And, how many watch crap shows where cattiness and humiliating people is normal?

We can be angry at these kids who drove this poor girl to her suicide, but we need to take a step back and ask how the hell could it get to the point where parents, teachers and administrators also did not intervene?!

My fear is this is this is only the tip of the iceberg of where this society is heading.

how very true.

I have always said that this all starts at home. Too many parents try to be a friend these days rather than a parent!

Excellent points, coffee.

Just picking up the "what's on YOUR TV?" part ... are there any shows that don't have racism, put-downs, ridiculing/humiliating others, name calling, intense competition, violence and retaliation, etc, etc.?

grammafreddy wrote:Excellent points, coffee.

Just picking up the "what's on YOUR TV?" part ... are there any shows that don't have racism, put-downs, ridiculing/humiliating others, name calling, intense competition, violence and retaliation, etc, etc.?

I don't think it's TV, I think it's the way people are raised. There were just as many *bleep* shows ten years ago as there are now. I think parenting has gotten worse over the years. Too many parents trying to be their kids "friend" than their parent like the above poster said.

After reading some of the comments placed on here, I agree fully with what everyone says. But the TV show thing, my daughter watches TV shows that im not exactly keen on, but she also knows the difference between reality and fake. She knows how to treat people and she also knows that if she ever treated anyone with dis respect, or bullied another person, the punishment she would get. I was raised by my parents with spankings, wooden spoons breaking on the counter and also would get treated by them the same way I treated others. If I was rude, spoke ill about some one, they treated me the same, so I knew how it felt. It worked, I was bullied as a teenager but over came it all, because I knew that I wanted to be better then that. Even when I spoke nasty things about my bully to my parents, they reminded me I was acting and doing the same as they were that made me feel so insecure about myself. My daughter who is 8 years old has been a victim of bullying and has been since grade 1. The difference is, my husband and I have taught my daughter the difference between what they are doing. It is not right, we have gone to some of the parents, one parent came out and said kids will be kids. UMMMM ya so when they hit 14-15 years old are your going to say oh teenagers will be teenagers when they beat up or bully another child, to where they want to die. Im sorry, the way adults think and also teach their child is wrong in every way. I dont think that you should spank your child, or anything, each to their own. My daughter yes has received one spanking, and that was for picking up a laptop computer and throwing it at her younger brother.(i felt guilty and more worse then she did) But in my opinion Bullying starts at home! and I believe my opinion that the parents are to blame one hundred percent. I see more drinking or get togethers of adults while their kids sit and watch tv, play their WII or DS or even be apart of these get togethers and they hear and see everything rude or not acceptable for young ears to hear. Less time is actually spent with the children. And i my self am at fault for this to. But I learned, and now when we have get togethers we dont tell the kids to go away, we have child friendly (that includes teenagers) conversations. At 9pm the kids should be in bed, and if you have teenagers well its adult time there is no need for them to be apart of it. They are out of ear, so we can have that adult conversation and enjoy some much needed adult time. The kids learn from what the see and hear, from us. And need to be taught the difference. As adults we are more of a bully then anything, whether you agree or not. But next time your driving down the road and some cuts you off, listen to what you say. Your children have heard all this. It took my child to be bullied for me to realize I was a bully as well, but in different ways. I wasnt purposely being one, but I was!

Parents also need to stop giving their kids free reign to do whatever they want on the internet. I know people who let their kids have their own computers in their room and are always on them. The computer should be in a public area of the house with parental locks on them. No chatrooms, facebook, etc. Sure, you might get bitched out by your kid for being one of the few kids who isn't on facebook when all their friends are but who cares. Suck it up and say no. You're the parent. Set time limits for the internet and have periods of time where the computer is off for everyone. Have family time, these commercials we see where everyone is in the living room on their own laptop are ridiculous and setting poor examples for family life. Unplug.

coffeeFreak wrote:I wonder how many of the kids who bullied and/or stood by while it happened are kids whose parents live in denial and have the belief that "my daughter or son wouldn't do that". We can never underestimate the power of peer pressure...heck I see it all the time in adults who bow to it. Too many parents teach their children crap like "Stay out of it...it isn't your business...it isn't your problem". How many ADULTS (not just parents) don't "do the right thing" while kids are watching? Or succumb to marketing pressure to ensure they and/or their children and/or nieces, nephews, grandchildren have all the up-to-date techno gadgets, name brand clothes, activities, vehicles etc, etc. And, how many watch crap shows where cattiness and humiliating people is normal?

We can be angry at these kids who drove this poor girl to her suicide, but we need to take a step back and ask how the hell could it get to the point where parents, teachers and administrators also did not intervene?!

My fear is this is this is only the tip of the iceberg of where this society is heading.

All of the parents are thinking "my kid wouldn't do that". All of the bullies have been taught to behave better than that.
Peer pressure is very very very strong out there parents. It is certainly a group power issue.

The intervention for suicidal teens is ridiculous, hopeless and useless.
School counsellors are not trained to deal with this type of psych problem - they are course selection counsellors.
"Keeping an eye on her" is not sufficient supervision.
Kids are scared to tell their parents they are being bullied - they already feel like what the bullies call them, they know they don't deserve it, and they can't bear to hear, "what did you do to bring this on", or "what did you say to make him do that?"
It's another dagger in the heart of a vulnerable child.

prairieflower wrote:
how very true.

I have always said that this all starts at home. Too many parents try to be a friend these days rather than a parent!

I think if these too many parents were not friends with their kids, they would have no relationship at all.
At least if they feel like 'friends', they will talk with each other, trust each other and not keep dangerous secrets.
While the parent may consider himself the kids friend, the kid still considers him the parent.