BC baby with 3 legal parents breaking new 'family' ground

[oneh2obabe]

A Vancouver baby has three parents named on her birth certificate, the first under new B.C. legislation that allows up to four legal parents.

Della Wolf Kangro Wiley Richards, three months old, became the legal daughter of a lesbian couple and their male friend after finalizing the registration process last week.

They are among the first Canadians to achieve this without using litigation, under British Columbia’s new Family Law Act passed last year.

When they decided to have a child, Anna Richards and wife Danielle Wiley both agreed that they wanted a father figure, rather than an anonymous donor.

“We wanted our kids to know where they came from biologically and actually liked the idea of having an extended family,” Ms. Richards says. “It didn’t threaten us to have another person’s involvement so long as it was the right person.”

Ms. Richards had gone to university with the father, Shawn Kangro, a close friend with whom she had informally joked about having kids together.

“Almost instantly, I knew I was going to be considering it really well,” Mr. Kangro says, adding that he consulted with his mother, sister and friends before making a decision. “It naturally felt very right.”

The three drafted up a formal agreement that set out the rules of their new relationship. They agreed that Ms. Richards and Ms. Wiley would be Della’s primary caregivers, responsible for custody and finances. Mr. Kangro, on the other hand, would be Della’s guardian by having a say in important decisions, like her schooling and medical history, and would have rights to access.

Ms. Wiley became pregnant with Della in January, 2013, with the help of a syringe, and gave birth on Oct. 23, 2013.

The couple first tried to apply last month for the certificate online, but were rejected when the form only offered two spots for parents’ names. They then received a form in the mail that also needed to be tweaked.

“In order to put me in as the non-biological mother in second row, we had to declare that the father was not recognized or was unable to be a father — which did not reflect our situation,” Ms. Richards says, adding that they changed the form’s wording.

No other provinces have legislation that allows more than two parents on a birth certificate, although such circumstances can be looked at on a case-by-case basis.

In January, 2007, the Ontario Court of Appeal ruled that a young boy could have one legal father and two legal mothers — making them the first official three-parent family in Canada.

The case created a precedent in Ontario that looks at four different situations: if the sperm donor is known; if he doesn’t want to concede parental rights; if the mother has a partner who wants recognized parental rights; and if the biological mother and father both agree to a third parent.

If a family falls under these circumstances, they can apply to a court to look at the situation, citing up to almost $4,000 in legal fees.

For now, Della’s parents are happy with the situation. When Mr. Kangro isn’t travelling for his job, he’s at the couple’s house every day to visit the baby.

“All of a sudden, all of Anna’s family and all of Danielle’s family is essentially my family,” he says. “We’re joining three families together through Della and possibly future children.”

http://news.nationalpost.com/2014/02/10 ... te-in-b-c/

[Hassel99]

I think that is neat, I hope it works out for them.

[Jo]

And if the marriage fails, there could be three people fighting for custody, child support and visitation. That should be interesting.

[oneh2obabe]

^^^Think the courts would uphold the formal agreement they drafted in event of a family breakdown.

The three drafted up a formal agreement that set out the rules of their new relationship. They agreed that Ms. Richards and Ms. Wiley would be Della’s primary caregivers, responsible for custody and finances. Mr. Kangro, on the other hand, would be Della’s guardian by having a say in important decisions, like her schooling and medical history, and would have rights to access.

[Jo]

I don't know if they would or not. Formal agreements have been overruled before, on the premise that a parent still has rights (and duties), regardless of what is signed.

[Rwede]

Poor kid. Hey Kangaroo!

I predict tears and black eyes in her future.

[JLives]

I doubt it. Kids these days are a lot more tolerant of different sorts of families than previous generations.

[Captain Awesome]

I predict tears and black eyes in her future.

...and countless therapy visits.

[TimmyE]

Friendships do come and go. And so I hope all three parents can stay on the same page. Any agreement can be broken and so I hope the male donor is prepared for a fight down the road. And look at that poor guy in Kansas who donated his sperm. The judge ruled his was financially responsible for the child. Now the poor guy has to appeal and lawyers don't come cheap. Ouch!

[Smurf]

I heard this a little while ago and I realize it is the US but it shows how fast things can go south.

"Kansas Sperm Donor Ordered to Pay Child Support"

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/kansas-spe ... d=21657212

You have to be very careful these days as nothing is guaranteed any more. As far as I see they had an agreement also.

[Hassel99]

I don't think this kid is going to have any more problems or therapy issues then your average kid. I think that in this day and age (TM) the more family that loves and can emotionally support a child the better.

Keep in mind the sitcom "my two dads" is almost 30 years old now...

[flamingfingers]

The more loving people involved in bringing up a kid the better! Most of my generation was brought up with uncles, aunts, grandparents, cousins older and younger, family friends and of course the teachers in the school system. With all these influences - some good, some not so good - we were able to use critical thinking skills when 'uncle' wanted you to go out to the barn with him to 'harness the horses'.

Let's not start tearing down this unit of friends quite yet - it may be that it will work out famously for the kid.

BTW - I in no way support the court decision regarding child support forced on a sperm donor! What a ridiculous decision!!

[Dizzy1]

If a couple chooses to start a same sex relationship, have at it, but if you choose that then leave it at that and raise the child as such and don't introduce unnecessary complications into a child's life. I can see this going south and causing a lot of problems down the road and the child is the one who will once again be the innocent victim.

[Buckeye19]

I doubt it. Kids these days are a lot more tolerant of different sorts of families than previous generations.

What planet are you living on? It wasn't that long ago I was in school and kids are ruthless.

[Buckeye19]

Poor kid. Hey Kangaroo!

I predict tears and black eyes in her future.

Judging by the poor kids name her "parents" must have some connection to the West Kootenays. Maybe BC should follow suit with Mexico:

WORLD
Mexican state bans 61 first names
by The Canadian Press

Parents in the Mexican state of Sonora will no longer be allowed to name their children "Facebook," ''Rambo" or 59 other now banned given names.

The names have been found at least once in state registries. And the list could grow because officials are still checking the state's 132 newborn registries, Sonora state Civil Registry director Cristina Ramirez said Tuesday.

The law banning a list of 61 odd or offensive names took effect Monday. It seeks to protect children from being bullied, Ramirez said.

"The law is very clear because it prohibits giving children names that are derogatory or that don't have any meaning and that can lead to bullying," she said.

Ramirez said that in the town of Navojoa a boy was recently named "Juan Calzon," or "Juan Panties," and a girl was named "Lady Di."

Other odd names include a girl called "Marciana," or "Martian," and a boy called "Circuncision," or "Circumcision."

Sonora is across the border from the U.S. state of Arizona.