Everyone thinks their kid is a Gretzky - banned

[Poindexter]

My son was in soccer and it wasn't much different. My son was a good player but it didn't matter if the other kids could just goon him every time he touched the ball. My personal favorite was when he had his back to the opposing player to protect the ball bigger kids would just flatten him from behind. He had his wind knocked out and or fat lips more than once from landing on the ball. My poor mother who used to join us stopped coming after running out into the field to help my son after he had his ankles cut out from under him. This same kid had flattened my son and other kids many times during the game with no calls. After picking him up off the ground she saw the blood making its way through his sock and laid into the ref asking, ''what's the matter with you!'.

The other teams parents, probably this kids father, became belligerent saying just let them play to which my mom said, 'you call that play, how'd you like it if my son (pointing to me) kicked your ankles hard enough to draw blood?" I stepped onto the field and calmed my mom down and gave the other father the dreaded head shake. As far as I was willing to take it even though I was angry as hell. Wanted to kick the guy in a far more sensitive place than the ankles after mouthing off my mother.

So while I totally understand how bad refs can turn a fun sport into a dangerous and frustrating game but as adults we still need to keep our heads if we expect our kids to learn how to deal with confrontation and rise above it.

[LordEd]

If you want me not to ask the rest of the questions and keep it dropped, do the same or at minimum don't draw me back in.

[Poindexter]

If you want me not to ask the rest of the questions and keep it dropped, do the same or at minimum don't draw me back in.

Well since we have an expert on the panel can I ask what is done to help out refs that are just lousy. I know it's volunteers who step up to fill the role but is there anything in place to teach those that seem to infuriate players and parents more than others? For their own sanity alone this would help but it's also about the safety of kids and the enjoyment of the game.

[LordEd]

I can't say the procedures for hockey, but I have occasionally seen evaluators and mentors with newer officials.

Our association does shadow games with all new officials, meaning the new official is reffing the game, but there is an extra official following them helping with the basics and available if anything significant happens.

After that, newer officials are paired with experienced officials as much as possible.

Periodically, everyone also gets an evaluation, which provides feedback/constructive criticism to help in their games. This has been lacking a bit, but has improved with 2 new evaluators in the valley starting a few years ago. Every 2 years (formerly 3) in a rule change year, everyone must take either a refresh or complete course. Everyone is also encouraged to take the L2/3 course which provides a more in-depth understanding of the game and mechanics of officiating.

Does that answer your question?

[Poindexter]

Yup. Thx.

[yaktak]

Your wrong Yak..

Go back , read about how patient we were about it . Read how we POLITELY asked if he could check on the kid..twice.
Read how , after it was clear that the ref was still doing nothing about it , Mom and the coaches decided to do it themselves.. Read how we understand these things happen.

Then read Lord Eds comments. Notice how he just doesn't get it ? If that isn't enough to get you choked , nothing will.

So , try again ...Without the " stuff " you chose to offer.

What stuff? I just can"t believe you blame a kid, for the terrible attitude of you and "The Boss" towards a kid trying to do a difficult job for meager sums of money.
LordEd seems to be the only one on here with any knowledge of officiating and he doesn't get it?

I think the people who try to blame referees for their disgusting behaviour are the ones who "don't get it"

Some people just seem to over react to every situation in their lives.
Here are a few examples:
1) Some one keeps cutting across the edge of my lawn
2) Some stranger is taking pictures of my house without my permission
3) My johnny fell while playing hockey and no one is doing anything

As well, when someone tells their side of a story it is always tilted in their favour(or they omit the parts that make them look bad), I would like to hear from the poor young referee, you had issues with, before I believe what you say.

I would also find it very hard to fathom that an eight year old with all the latest hockey gear can even get hurt. They don't skate very fast, don't have a long way to fall and are so armored up can they even get a bruise?

People can get hurt playing or doing anything. And as I mentioned earlier, the drama really comes out of individuals, when they think they are protecting their off spring.

For some reason now, Eric Lindros comes to mind.

[simnut]

I would also find it very hard to fathom that an eight year old with all the latest hockey gear can even get hurt. They don't skate very fast, don't have a long way to fall and are so armored up can they even get a bruise?

That part right there tells me you haven't experienced the life of a minor sport parent. Until then, it may be quite difficult for you to "fathom" much of what a sports parent states.

[Catz]

People still want to blame everyone else but them self. The coach should control the bench, even though some of them should NOT be there. The kids need to control them self self on the ice and when they do something dirty kick them out and bench them a few times. Parents need to shut up or get out of the arena. The new young refs are learning and they will make mistakes. For an adult to yell and berate them is childish. Do you think these young refs will want to come back? Note also.....without the refs, there would be NO hockey. If you have a complaint deal with it with the association. I have a hard time with parents who think yelling at children is acceptable.

[simnut]

For an adult to yell and berate them is childish. Do you think these young refs will want to come back? Note also.....without the refs, there would be NO hockey. If you have a complaint deal with it with the association. I have a hard time with parents who think yelling at children is acceptable.

I agree.....IF the association would deal with it properly. There is so much politics involved sometimes...that it ISN'T dealt with properly. I'm just trying to explain where SOME of the frustration comes from ...the parent side.

[Catz]

I get that part trust me, just don't yell at scream at the refs. ...or other parents for that part...on either team. I have been around the rink a many of years and i shake my head. I think many people forget these are kids.




ETA......I am a parent who dealt with rep and house. I am speaking as a parent.

[LordEd]

I would also find it very hard to fathom that an eight year old with all the latest hockey gear can even get hurt. They don't skate very fast, don't have a long way to fall and are so armored up can they even get a bruise?

Injuries can and do happen at all levels. Think collisions where neither player has the ability to stop fast plus awkward position off balance while trying to turn. All it takes is a fall at a funny angle. Some younger injuries are more 'shaken up' than injury, but still warrant a stop in play.

[yaktak]

I would also find it very hard to fathom that an eight year old with all the latest hockey gear can even get hurt. They don't skate very fast, don't have a long way to fall and are so armored up can they even get a bruise?

People can get hurt playing or doing anything. And as I mentioned earlier, the drama really comes out of individuals, when they think they are protecting their off spring.

You all quoted me, but you forgot to add the whole thing.

I have spent many a day in the hospital emergency rooms(sometimes, hours and hours) for myself and my kids, because of our sport of choice (not hockey). I do understand what being a parent of an active child is all about. Best part is they all grew up, made it though with only a few scratches and scars. And we didn't coddle them, let them explore and experience the world for themselves(with some guidance, as best we could).

Everyone has their stories. Some worse than others. But unless a kid has some prior medical condition, I don't think they can get hurt very badly at that age group in a hockey game. Get hurt yes, but to what level of severity(life and death?) and to freak out at a referee over it, is a little much. If someone is hurt on the ice, by all means, the ref should stop the game.

I was visiting with a friend in Whislter years ago and we where at the arena. Very young kids where out having a practise, suddenly a women shrieks and all hell breaks loose. Screaming and yelling. Little Johnny is lying down on the ice, face down.
The first person to reach him, rolls him over,"Are you ok?" Little Jonny's response "Yeah, no problem, I was just tired and taking a rest"

Overreaction! Even if little Johnny was hurt, and required hospitalization. How does freaking out and yelling, help in any way?

[MAPearce]

What stuff? I just can"t believe you blame a kid, for the terrible attitude of you and "The Boss" towards a kid trying to do a difficult job for meager sums of money.

Who said anything about blame ?

We , not just us but an opposing players parent , were dumbfounded that the Ref in this instance couldn't process a request that shouldn't have to have been asked.

Don't twist my words.. Go back and READ. We asked for the ref to check the kid ..TWICE.

He didn't. When he was given enough time yet still "had his thumb up his *bleep*" parents and coaches took over .

Simple.

The kid was never spoken to in ANY manner after that .. There was no need ..

OK ?

One more thing ...

Some people just seem to over react to every situation in their lives.
Here are a few examples:
1) Some one keeps cutting across the edge of my lawn
2) Some stranger is taking pictures of my house without my permission
3) My johnny fell while playing hockey and no one is doing anything

Cyberstalkers who have nothing better to do than cruise a posting history.....I see you've added your "stuff" to that too.

But hey , whatever floats you boat ;)

[LordEd]

What was the injury anyway?

[yaktak]

Cyberstalkers who have nothing better to do than cruise a posting history.....I see you've added your "stuff" to that too.

But hey , whatever floats you boat ;)

I am not sure what this "stuff "is that you are talking about. I don't get it.
Giving examples of overreaction?
I am discussing overreaction, which is what I think this thread is about. Or the root cause of what this thread is about.

You are the one resorting to name calling, but hey, whatever floats your boat.