What the hell was she thinking?
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What the hell was she thinking?
Oh wait, she's 20 years old and figures if she can spend $16K on plastic surgery for herself it's okay to torture her 3 year old daughter.
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When former "Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham proudly blogged about waxing and tweezing her 3-year-old daughter's eyebrows this week, readers wasted no time in online shaming her.
"Are you developmentally challenged?" "This is sad!!!! She is a little girl!!!!" "You are insane," "That poor baby" and "Shame on you!!!!" were among the comments that didn't mince words in response to Abraham's blog post on Sulia.
In it, the 20-year-old mom, who recently underwent $16,000 worth of plastic surgery to alter her breasts, chin and nose, wrote about how she decided to wax her daughter Sophia's "unibrow" because she felt bad for her. When Sophia protested mid-wax, Abraham finished the job by using tweezers on her sleeping child. "I feel like a good mom," she wrote. "Other moms tell me your ideas!"
And that's when the online browbeating began.
"It's very easy to vilify this young mom, and what I think we might focus on instead is how to provide support to all moms about what's appropriate at different stages of development," Child Mind Institute psychologist Rachel Busman told Yahoo! Shine. "I understand a parent's desire to have their child look good and fit in. So I try to look at the best intentions."
On the other hand, she added, "There seems to be more of a focus on appearance of children at a younger and younger age, and I think that is concerning."
Busman also noted that Abraham is not an aesthetician, and that young Sophia could have actually gotten burned. "It can be a painful experience," she said, "especially for a child who doesn't know what's happening."
Pageant mom Lisa VanHooser concurred. "I've been a licensed cosmetologist for 8 years, and I've never waxed a 3-year-old." VanHooser, who co-owns, with her husband, the Alabama-based Tutu Glitz on Tour Pageant System, said the youngest girl she has waxed was a still-young 10. But, she added, "Sometimes people use eyebrow razors that are not harmful, and a much better alternative to waxing."
Such early-in-life beauty obsessions, experts told us, can cause plenty of negative repercussions.
"The big issue is teaching young girls to value themselves based on how they look instead of who they are," explained Diane Levin, early childhood education professor at Boston's Wheelock College and co-author of So Sexy So Soon: The New Sexualized Childhood and How Parents Can Protect Their Kids. "This plugs right into how young children think; they focus on what they can see and not what lies underneath."
Also wreaking havoc with toddlers in a situation like Sophia's "is being told 'You're not pretty,' and how that standard is set," the professor added. "Being pretty is defined by the culture."
Levin says being taught to focus on beauty can lead to a lifetime of psychological and social problems. "If your mother values you based on how you look, then appearance becomes the focus of what you care about, instead of the emotional attachment," she explained. That, in turn, can cause an inability to understand how to have caring, connective relationships. "When children are objectified, it undermines the development of relationships and the ability to develop a positive self image."
Another possible casualty can be something Levin calls "compassion deficit disorder," which is often a factor in "mean girl" playground situations. "I hear about bullying behavior among 5-year-olds I used to hear about with 9-year-olds," noted Levin, a former kindergarten teacher. "That begins with the parent."
But when a young child comes home upset about an aspect of his or her appearance, and wants to change it, both Levin and Busman agree that the best approach is to initiate a thoughtful discussion.
"Three-year-olds don't usually come home and say 'I have a uni-brow,' but older kids might," Busman said. "And we want to support them by helping them to make sense of their own feelings and to help them make an appropriate decision. I'm not the one who can say what that right decision is." It could actually be a perfect teaching moment, she says, "about really embracing kids and people that are different."
* * * * *
When former "Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham proudly blogged about waxing and tweezing her 3-year-old daughter's eyebrows this week, readers wasted no time in online shaming her.
"Are you developmentally challenged?" "This is sad!!!! She is a little girl!!!!" "You are insane," "That poor baby" and "Shame on you!!!!" were among the comments that didn't mince words in response to Abraham's blog post on Sulia.
In it, the 20-year-old mom, who recently underwent $16,000 worth of plastic surgery to alter her breasts, chin and nose, wrote about how she decided to wax her daughter Sophia's "unibrow" because she felt bad for her. When Sophia protested mid-wax, Abraham finished the job by using tweezers on her sleeping child. "I feel like a good mom," she wrote. "Other moms tell me your ideas!"
And that's when the online browbeating began.
"It's very easy to vilify this young mom, and what I think we might focus on instead is how to provide support to all moms about what's appropriate at different stages of development," Child Mind Institute psychologist Rachel Busman told Yahoo! Shine. "I understand a parent's desire to have their child look good and fit in. So I try to look at the best intentions."
On the other hand, she added, "There seems to be more of a focus on appearance of children at a younger and younger age, and I think that is concerning."
Busman also noted that Abraham is not an aesthetician, and that young Sophia could have actually gotten burned. "It can be a painful experience," she said, "especially for a child who doesn't know what's happening."
Pageant mom Lisa VanHooser concurred. "I've been a licensed cosmetologist for 8 years, and I've never waxed a 3-year-old." VanHooser, who co-owns, with her husband, the Alabama-based Tutu Glitz on Tour Pageant System, said the youngest girl she has waxed was a still-young 10. But, she added, "Sometimes people use eyebrow razors that are not harmful, and a much better alternative to waxing."
Such early-in-life beauty obsessions, experts told us, can cause plenty of negative repercussions.
"The big issue is teaching young girls to value themselves based on how they look instead of who they are," explained Diane Levin, early childhood education professor at Boston's Wheelock College and co-author of So Sexy So Soon: The New Sexualized Childhood and How Parents Can Protect Their Kids. "This plugs right into how young children think; they focus on what they can see and not what lies underneath."
Also wreaking havoc with toddlers in a situation like Sophia's "is being told 'You're not pretty,' and how that standard is set," the professor added. "Being pretty is defined by the culture."
Levin says being taught to focus on beauty can lead to a lifetime of psychological and social problems. "If your mother values you based on how you look, then appearance becomes the focus of what you care about, instead of the emotional attachment," she explained. That, in turn, can cause an inability to understand how to have caring, connective relationships. "When children are objectified, it undermines the development of relationships and the ability to develop a positive self image."
Another possible casualty can be something Levin calls "compassion deficit disorder," which is often a factor in "mean girl" playground situations. "I hear about bullying behavior among 5-year-olds I used to hear about with 9-year-olds," noted Levin, a former kindergarten teacher. "That begins with the parent."
But when a young child comes home upset about an aspect of his or her appearance, and wants to change it, both Levin and Busman agree that the best approach is to initiate a thoughtful discussion.
"Three-year-olds don't usually come home and say 'I have a uni-brow,' but older kids might," Busman said. "And we want to support them by helping them to make sense of their own feelings and to help them make an appropriate decision. I'm not the one who can say what that right decision is." It could actually be a perfect teaching moment, she says, "about really embracing kids and people that are different."
Dance as if no one's watching, sing as if no one's listening, and live everyday as if it were your last.
Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly.
Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly.
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oneh2obabe - goruchaf meistres y bwrdd
- Posts: 35726
- Joined: Nov 23rd, 2007, 9:19 am
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Problem 1) She had a kid at 16 and got on TV because of it
Problem 2) She spent $16k on plastic surgery at 20
Problem 3) She's on the road to ruining her 3 year olds self image because she happens to be a shallow pile of crap
# strikes, you're out. Someone should take that poor kid away before she's scarred for life.
Problem 2) She spent $16k on plastic surgery at 20
Problem 3) She's on the road to ruining her 3 year olds self image because she happens to be a shallow pile of crap
# strikes, you're out. Someone should take that poor kid away before she's scarred for life.
- underscore
- Generalissimo Postalot
- Posts: 873
- Joined: Apr 5th, 2007, 11:12 pm
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
:ohmygod: What is wrong with our society!!! Holy crap!
How do change it?
How do change it?
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
~Anais Nin
~Anais Nin
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WeatherWoman - Buddha of the Board
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- Joined: Jul 30th, 2009, 8:25 pm
- Location: Vancouver Island
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
kid DID have a unibrow.:P
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
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normaM - Walks on Forum Water
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- Joined: Sep 18th, 2007, 7:28 am
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
normaM wrote:kid DID have a unibrow.:P
:coffeecanuck:
:hailjo:
"The greatest barrier to a great financial position, is a 'good enough' financial position
You need a budget. The most crucial step to stability & prosperity. Ask me how!
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GoStumpy - Grand Pooh-bah
- Posts: 2452
- Joined: Feb 28th, 2008, 12:47 am
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
I'm sorry to be the bearer, but:
This is a perfect example of what the general public wants in this western society.
We the people are the driving force behind what we see on TV and through other media outlets and this girl is exactly what the general public has dictated it wants to see.
Disgusting concept, eh?
This is a perfect example of what the general public wants in this western society.
We the people are the driving force behind what we see on TV and through other media outlets and this girl is exactly what the general public has dictated it wants to see.
Disgusting concept, eh?
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter - Martin Luther King Jr.
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Graham Adder - Lord of the Board
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- Joined: Apr 14th, 2009, 9:51 am
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Hey back off people this is a fine example of a modern woman she could care less what you or anyone else thinks she sets her own standards and shes earned the right to do anything she wants loves Jersey Shore I'm sure.WeatherWoman wrote::ohmygod: What is wrong with our society!!! Holy crap!
How do change it?
She makes any kind of statement she desires look around you it gets more sordid every day.
Don't you know nice girls finish last ?
The guys are just as bad azz isn't it wonderful ? Stupid is now in and it sells !
- Takin it easy !
- Übergod
- Posts: 1288
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Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Stupid may be "IN" but it doesn't mean it's acceptable.
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
~Anais Nin
~Anais Nin
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WeatherWoman - Buddha of the Board
- Posts: 19804
- Joined: Jul 30th, 2009, 8:25 pm
- Location: Vancouver Island
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Agreed !WeatherWoman wrote:Stupid may be "IN" but it doesn't mean it's acceptable.
- Takin it easy !
- Übergod
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Re: What the hell was she thinking?
WeatherWoman wrote::ohmygod: What is wrong with our society!!! Holy crap!
How do change it?
I think prohibiting beauty pagents for kids would a good start.
Conform with the non-conformists
- rideforever
- Generalissimo Postalot
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Re: What the hell was she thinking?
people get their babies ears pierced and no one shouts about it.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
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normaM - Walks on Forum Water
- Posts: 12215
- Joined: Sep 18th, 2007, 7:28 am
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Graham Adder wrote:We the people are the driving force behind what we see on TV and through other media outlets
No we're not. We take what a few *bleep* decide we wiill see, and we take it happily
and we say thank you for the crap.
That's how the world works.
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Thinktank - Übergod
- Posts: 1442
- Joined: Nov 5th, 2010, 6:21 am
Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Yes this is done because the baby has expressed a desire to have his or her ears pierced ! " Stupid Parents" :clueless:normaM wrote:people get their babies ears pierced and no one shouts about it.
Last edited by Takin it easy ! on Jan 13th, 2013, 3:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.
- Takin it easy !
- Übergod
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Re: What the hell was she thinking?
Not stupid parents - that's a culture thing. Waxing a child's face isn't.
- Fancy
- Admiral HMS Castanet
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Re: What the hell was she thinking?
oh come now Fancy - I know lots of people who had their babies ears pierced for no other reason that " it's cute"
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
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normaM - Walks on Forum Water
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- Joined: Sep 18th, 2007, 7:28 am
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