Too Many Kids

[Even Steven]

I'm not going to have kids because the idea of growing a little person inside of me literally disgusts me.

Yeah, please don't. Stick to cats.

[kgcayenne]

One gifts me with sleepless nights as it is; I can't possibly imagine 12.

[Queen K]

The way I see it, I had none and my neighbour had three.
I know many people and couples who never had kids.
I know equally as many who lost them all or some due to all kinds of reasons I won't go into.

And why did people on farms have mega kids? 8 was low and 16 was normal? NO Birth Control. No easy access to it when it did arrive. And don't forget Quebec's Quiet Revolution where the Church lost almost complete control on the population, specifically women and child bearing in the 1960s. Birthrates plummeted.

Every time I see a mom/dad/ or mom/boyfriend kill all or most of their kids on the news I get sick. I would have adopted those kids! Given them a chance. Or someone would have.

[whatwhat]

Yeah, please don't. Stick to cats.

Who needs cats when, apparently, all I need to Pokemon!! You should figured it all out Even Steven

[Lady tehMa]

I have two, because I couldn't handle the pain of labour again. Selfishness, plain and simple - but I acknowledge that.

I have friends with more than two kids.

Some with three, some with 5 or 6. One with 8, one with 11 and one with 12.

Out of all the kids I know, the ones from the larger families are the most grounded, the least entitled and the most responsible. Often getting jobs early on to pay for the extras they'd like, or to save for secondary education. One young man is headed to med school with full scholarship. Another is headed to law school, same deal.

I submit that it is not the quantity of children, but the quality of the people that should matter.

We need to raise more community-minded people who aren't just out for themselves. We need to raise people who give back, not just take.

[Silverstarqueen]

Yes, the farmers had large families, but they raised them to be hardworking and responsible. My parents were both of families with 9 children, but worked hard, were law abiding and raised their kids right. It's not the number of children, but can you provide for them and raise them to be self supporting, good community members, and responsible for their own children too.

And I agree that children of larger families more often grow up to be stable individuals who understand caring for others beyond their own little selves and working together, not against each other.
I think the average in our neighborhood is about two kids per family, some have none, some have more, but they are good families, so numbers not the most important thing.

[whatwhat]

With religious families, such as The Duggars, they have large families as their religion doesn't believe in birth control. If God wanted you to have a small family, he wouldn't allow you too get pregnant anymore. They would also have a larger community to pull from through their church.

[kgcayenne]

I have said before that I think birth control has allowed a degradation of sorts. Really, just hear me out.

Before birth control, responsible people could avoid pregnancy with some work, but sometimes got pregnant anyway and went on to raise children with similar, responsible values. It kind-of evened the score because the irresponsible and more careless people were having plenty of kids. Once birth control came onto the scene, the responsible people had a tool to be even MORE responsible, and were good at making use of the birth control pill. Their child-bearing became carefully-planned events, and the birth rate went down. So now, who do we have left having babies? Those who are either too careless to use BC at all, or too inept to use it properly, or people who plan for and can raise many children; the latter are rare.

[Nomaster]

Have a kid or two but 20?
Don't these people think about the ecological footprint of their choices?
http://www.footprintnetwork.org/en/inde ... _overview/

Snippet.
Human activities consume resources and produce waste. As our populations grow and global consumption increases, it is essential that we measure nature’s capacity to meet these demands on our planet. The Ecological Footprint has emerged as one of the world’s leading measures of human demand on nature. It allows us to calculate human pressure on the planet and come up with facts such as: If everyone lived the lifestyle of the average American, we would need 5 planets. Ecological Footprint Accounting thus addresses whether the planet is large enough to keep up with the demands of humanity.

[Hassel99]

I have said before that I think birth control has allowed a degradation of sorts. Really, just hear me out.

Before birth control, responsible people could avoid pregnancy with some work, but sometimes got pregnant anyway and went on to raise children with similar, responsible values. It kind-of evened the score because the irresponsible and more careless people were having plenty of kids. Once birth control came onto the scene, the responsible people had a tool to be even MORE responsible, and were good at making use of the birth control pill. Their child-bearing became carefully-planned events, and the birth rate went down. So now, who do we have left having babies? Those who are either too careless to use BC at all, or too inept to use it properly, or people who plan for and can raise many children; the latter are rare.

Ever seen the movie idiocracy? Its hilarious but shows a scary future where the our dumbest out birth the rest of us and their idiot offspring shape the culture to the detriment of all.

[Rosemary1]

Pretty sure income from reality show helps. Duggars are just one more sad case of another mediocre reality show. In the case of Duggars it pivots around how many kids they can pop out until skeletons in closets start to come out.. Only in America!

[kgcayenne]

Ever seen the movie idiocracy? Its hilarious but shows a scary future where the our dumbest out birth the rest of us and their idiot offspring shape the culture to the detriment of all.

I've not seen the movie, but I believe a certain upcoming election and all its shenanigans is a gleaming example and preview of this.

[flamingfingers]

kgcayenne wrote:

Before birth control, responsible people could avoid pregnancy with some work, but sometimes got pregnant anyway and went on to raise children with similar, responsible values.

I know you are a bit further from the issues than I was, but the 'work' you may be suggesting is a cooperative attitude by both parents which was not quite how it turned out. Women 'back then' were subject to a husband's 'needs' which he exercised, regardless of the wife's wishes which often resulted in a woman's (and her husband's) unwanted pregnancy. Imagine having had 4 kids in rapid succession with another on the way...no money, an angry husband and overwhelmed with all the demands of wife, mother and housework. Did she have ANY choice? Her ONLY choice was to attempt self-induced abortion or going to a 'friend' to help her solve her 'problem'.

Many desperate women went down this path and it ended up with motherless kids. If safe, effective and nonjudgemental intervention had been available, those kids would have been better off. With a live mother. My grandma had 15 kids, 9 of whom survived. She said that if she had had a CHOICE she would only have had 3!

[Nomaster]

My maternal grandmother had 13 pregnancies.
My mother is the oldest and was privy to information about the pregnancies that she shouldn't have been burdened with.
My grandmother was frequently frustrated, angry and wanted miscarriages.

My mother is also aware that her mother became depressed when a friend committed suicide due to another pregnancy.

We know that spousal abuse often increases during an unwanted pregnancy.

Last point I'll make- I know of a retired and now late ob/gyn in Vernon who performed abortions prior to the 1988-ish law change. He knew of women who were 'pro-life' in public and conveniently pro-abortion for their own daughter's unplanned pregnancy.

[Bpeep]

*removed*