Too Many Kids

[Graham Adder]

I submit that it is not the quantity of children, but the quality of the people that should matter.

I would submit that that is a very faithful sounding submission.
It's the mindset that overlooks the very real numbers that frightens me more than anyone speaking about quality when it comes to kids.

good gawd

[Queen K]

For a truly insightful and sensitive treatment to the subject of kids, abortion and small town living, please find a 2009 copy of Amy McKay's book:

http://amimckay.com/books/the-birth-house/

I had a copy but sold it of course.

[Ice cream You Scream]

*removed*

[I made you read this]

*removed*

[normaM]

Mega families strike me as Vanity. If they didn't get extras ( tax credit, etc) would they still have 8 children? Where they trying for a pony?
Hard time believing children from large fams get the attention they should from the parent unit.
And they give them names start with same letter LOL

[Grandan]

Mega families strike me as Vanity. If they didn't get extras ( tax credit, etc) would they still have 8 children? Where they trying for a pony?
Hard time believing children from large fams get the attention they should from the parent unit.
And they give them names start with same letter LOL

I came from a family of 8 kids. It was my brothers who raised me, my mother raised the first two and then it was up to them raise the others and so on down the line. It is the only child who gets parental attention exclusively and I am not convinced that that is a desirable thing for humanity.
With large families, the kids take care of each other under the guidance of their parents.
If the parents can afford 10 kids why is it a problem for other people? The happiest kids I know have siblings to play with and older brothers or sister to help look out for them at school and in the neighbourhood. Take a look at the Syrian refugees, many of whom have large families, do the kids look unhappy?

[kgcayenne]

Good points. When I consider the differences between someone like myself, raised an only child, and others from families with two or more siblings, It's clear to me that siblings are a good thing.

Again, it goes back to the type of people having children, and that even factors into the scenarios that pre-date birth control that are discussed by Flamingfingers and others. After all it's not a quality husband who lacks consideration for demands placed on his wife and kids. Not all women are motherhood quality either, and they have options now.

Since birth control technology is readily available, I'm not certain it is the right people who are having children. I have two cousins whose mother is a train wreck; she's raised them in her awful path after my uncle's passing. The eldest refuses to reproduce and perpetuate the cycle, because she knows she can't do it based on what she's been taught. The younger one was beaten so badly while growing-up that he's sterile. As terrible as it is to say this: at least one line of train-wrecks is stopped in its tracks.

I suspect I'll get significant hate for this, but, aside from special circumstances, women now have all the control over procreation. There are two ways a man can take some of that control back: abstinence & vasectomy. The latter is not easily attained.

[Nomaster]

Your last point is not true.

I have an ex-boyfriend who had one child and then got a vasectomy before he was 26

[kgcayenne]

Your last point is not true.

I have an ex-boyfriend who had one child and then got a vasectomy before he was 26

He had a child. It's not often a Dr will approve a vasectomy when the man has NOT had a child.

Edited to add: I have heard of childless men being successful in getting approval based on hereditary health problems that should not be passed on.

[Grandan]

Your last point is not true.

I have an ex-boyfriend who had one child and then got a vasectomy before he was 26

Well that is one way of leveling the playing field, to finally figure out how men could have babies.
Is he a genetic rarity or was it a sex change?

[Nomaster]

Nope, just a young man who didn't want more kids.

[Jonrox]

He had a child. It's not often a Dr will approve a vasectomy when the man has NOT had a child.

Edited to add: I have heard of childless men being successful in getting approval based on hereditary health problems that should not be passed on.

This isn't remotely true. It's not a problem at all.

You go to your family doctor with your significant other, tell the doctor you've decided you don't want kids, and the doctor will refer you to a specialist. Then you go to the specialist a couple of weeks later and get it done.

Doctors don't have the slightest problem with it. It's not a fight at all and the procedure is a piece of cake.

Edit: maybe they'd have a problem with a 21-year old single guy without kids, but they don't have a problem with young guys making decisions like this with their significant others. Even then, I doubt most doctors would deny the vasectomy.

[kgcayenne]

I had no idea this has loosened up so much.

Sort of levels the playing field...

[Silverstarqueen]

I have also heard of cases where, for the safety and health of the woman, a husband might get a vasectomy to prevent a pregnancy that could be risky for the woman. Especially considering that other forms of birth control are not all 100% sure.

[OREZ]

He had a child. It's not often a Dr will approve a vasectomy when the man has NOT had a child.

Edited to add: I have heard of childless men being successful in getting approval based on hereditary health problems that should not be passed on.

This isn't remotely true. It's not a problem at all.

You go to your family doctor with your significant other, tell the doctor you've decided you don't want kids, and the doctor will refer you to a specialist. Then you go to the specialist a couple of weeks later and get it done.

Doctors don't have the slightest problem with it. It's not a fight at all and the procedure is a piece of cake.

Edit: maybe they'd have a problem with a 21-year old single guy without kids, but they don't have a problem with young guys making decisions like this with their significant others. Even then, I doubt most doctors would deny the vasectomy.

It may not be true now (and that's a good thing) but it was true in the past.