Did Jesus have any kids?

[5VP]

This thread is funny. Mary was a virgin apparently. Arcangel Gabriel came to her and told her she was with child. Well...that's what she told Joseph anyways. Hummm ??? If she was married to Joseph how could she be a virgin ? Hummm ???
Jesus was half man, half ??? Arcangel ??? I heard he had a brother.

Simple. Mary was a surrogate. Science can do the same thing today and the archangel was either a horndog or a celestial geneticist; or both.

The bible is definitely open to revised viewpoints and that's what makes it an interesting puzzle for me, cuz I myself enjoy the bible but have difficulty wrapping my head around the idea that every animal on the planet lived within walking distance of Noah's Ark.

For us to fully understand what happened back then enough to uncategorically deny the existence of Jesus is kind of like trying to get a person from 2 thousand years ago to understand that humans will one day be able to talk to anyone on the planet (as in the Book of Revelations) by holding a mouse in their hand to use while staring at a glass lamp that sends words back and forth (to god(s)) by punching keys on a board.

Good luck with that...

[French Castanut]

Mary was a surrogate. Science can do the same thing today and the archangel was a celestial scientist.

The bible is definitely open to revised viewpoints cuz I myself enjoy the bible but have difficulty wrapping my head around the idea that every animal on the planet lived within walking distance of Noah's Ark.

Birds travel thousands of kilometers every year.

Noah built his boat in 40 years... more than enough time to do some walking to get there.

And was there not just one big continent back in the days?

Otherwise please explain me how the kangoroos traveled accross the Pacific Ocean. Kayak maybe.

There was a documentary a couple years ago about how and where they recently found Noah's boat. Big enough to accomodate all of the mammals on the planet.

[5VP]

Mary was a surrogate. Science can do the same thing today and the archangel was a celestial scientist.

The bible is definitely open to revised viewpoints cuz I myself enjoy the bible but have difficulty wrapping my head around the idea that every animal on the planet lived within walking distance of Noah's Ark.

Birds travel thousands of kilometers every year.

Noah built his boat in 40 years... more than enough time to do some walking to get there.

And was there not just one big continent back in the days?

Otherwise please explain me how the kangoroos traveled accross the Pacific Ocean. Kayak maybe.

There was a documentary a couple years ago about how and where they recently found Noah's boat. Big enough to accomodate all of the mammals on the planet.

It wasn't so much an ark in the sense of a boat but a genetic "archive". One of many that were built for that event.

Realistically; What did Noah build all the whalesize fish tanks out of and how much wood would have been required to stay afloat with the fish tanks full of enough clean water to live for 40 days and nights??

Check out Hamlet's Mill for starters...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamlet%27s_Mill

[Nebula]

Or Noah didn't build anything because Noah didn't exist and the whole story is just a fable.

No one seriously believes that three little pigs built their own homes, but some people actually believe that a guy named Noah and a few other people built a boat that could hold two of every living thing.

[JOF585]

No doubt in my mind that Jesus existed but he was not sent by God. He was a pure mortal. Well... that's only my opinion.
By the way, who wrote the Bible ? Not God. Mere mortals again.

[5VP]

Or Noah didn't build anything because Noah didn't exist and the whole story is just a fable.

No one seriously believes that three little pigs built their own homes, but some people actually believe that a guy named Noah and a few other people built a boat that could hold two of every living thing.

Pigs can and do build their own homes. Maybe not according to human standards but homes that suit their requirements nonetheless; and who are we to judge them?

Revision of views falls short of credible validity when facts are ignored or altered. We know of a fellow named Noah because for some inexplicable reason his story has survived the ages.

Our own existence is scientifically proven to be impossible by quantum mechanics so I always propose to live by the fact that that the angle of the dangle will always be equal to the heat of the meat when the mass of *bleep* remains constant....

[Nebula]

Now that's mind boggling.

I was speaking of the Three Pigs. You know, THE three pigs. Straw, brick, mud...

[steven lloyd]

Jesus Christ was a rock star of his time. I bet he had lots of kids ( lots of single moms left behind ).

[Born_again]

..... Seems at that time condoms and birth control were not around .....

This is not the case. Contraception had been used for at least 1,500 years before Herod & Co., and is well documented. Sea sponge, crocodile intestine, grass, wool, linen bungs, .... etc. What's more, it was fairly reliable. If it failed, abortion or infanticide were practised in many ancient cultures.

[cliffy1]

First you would have to establish whether or not Jesus actually existed to even ask that question. There is no proof that he did, so where would anybody get DNA to test any living person with? But assuming that he did live and we had DNA to work with, there could possibly be millions of people who could carry some of his DNA.

About 20 years ago a friend wrote a novel about a living heir to Jesus' legacy living in the present. He speculated that this person would be living in seclusion and anonymity because let's face it, would you want a billion people always banging on your door asking dumb questions 24/7?

[LoneWolf_53]

Realistically; What did Noah build all the whalesize fish tanks out of and how much wood would have been required to stay afloat with the fish tanks full of enough clean water to live for 40 days and nights??

Better yet how about explaining why Noah would have to go and get whales?

They do swim and live in the ocean do they not?

[Glacier]

Simple. Everyone knows they are inflatable. They even have a big hole on top to let the air out.

[PatrickFoster]

doesnt it say somewhere where he went from town 2 town with his blessings lol.....what was that "blessing" his "virgin" soul or a cup of tea xD

[grammafreddy]

doesnt it say somewhere where he went from town 2 town with his blessings lol.....what was that "blessing" his "virgin" soul or a cup of tea xD

fish and a loaf of bread, wasn't it?