Children of Divorced Parents.

Social, economic and environmental issues in our ever-changing world.
Warden57
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by Warden57 »

Its better to be from a broken home than to live in one.
Vacancyrate
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by Vacancyrate »

https://www.castanet.net/news/Vernon/30 ... s-children

Reverse the sexes and this would never happen.

Part of the reason I'll never have kids is the divorce rates and laws in this country.

75% chance of divorce and then it's a 85% chance I won't get custody if there is kids involved then it's 50/50 if my own children will be poisoned against me and 100% that I'll be paying the bills.

That's a hell of a gamble.
LANDM
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by LANDM »

*removed*
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GordonH
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by GordonH »

imho part of the problem is many couples after they marry, they start a family right away. Now unless the couple has been living together for some time, they really don’t know each other.

Get married get to know the good, the bad and ugly of your partner. If after that you still want children with each other, go for it. Hopefully one day you will be celebrating your 50th and onward.
"You've Gotta' Ask Yourself A Question. 'Do I Feel Lucky?' Well Do Ya...PUNK?" Harry Callahan
Vacancyrate
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by Vacancyrate »

GordonH wrote:imho part of the problem is many couples after they marry, they start a family right away. Now unless the couple has been living together for some time, they really don’t know each other.


Naw it's North American women, child support/custody laws and our consumer culture.

The standard is : "What did you do for me today?"

Never mind last week, last month, last year.

Yes guys cheat and leave women too - but 70% of all divorces are initiated by women and there just isn't that many wifebeaters to account for that number.

For couples in their late 20 and early 30's - 90% of divorces are initiated by women.
nepal
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by nepal »

COV19 and family stress because of it, could put extra strain on many families. Now is the time for families to take a deep breath and work together to get through this pandemic. Family members may lose jobs due to COV19, but help each other through tough times. Now more than ever is time to stick together and pull through this.

Use tough times to demonstrate to your kids, how to stay calm and think of how to economize and do with less things. This is a time for strengthening your family, doing activities like helping your kids with school work, going for family walks at parks, grow vegetables in pots or yard, doing household chores together, or doing courses to enhance employment opportunities. Reduce debt, and work on creating employment income prospects and eventually that will happen, maybe even necessitating a move.

Your kids will likely encounter tough times too as adults, so now is your time to teach them how to positively make it through adversity. Be a good example for your kids to model upon.

https://beechacres.org/discussing-job-loss-unemployment-or-disruption-in-employment-with-your-children/
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nepal
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by nepal »

Adversity creates the opportunity to become stronger.
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Vacancyrate
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by Vacancyrate »

More and more men are staying away from marriage.

There is nothing but risk involved for men.

Alternatively for women, marriage is how they ascend social and economic ladders.

You're a stepping stone. Clue in and lift yourself up.

Let the girls lift themselves up. Equality is a great thing.

It would be nice to see some women on the Forbes list that didnt get their wealth via divorce or inheritance.
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zookeeper
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by zookeeper »

Vacancyrate wrote:More and more men are staying away from marriage.

There is nothing but risk involved for men.

Alternatively for women, marriage is how they ascend social and economic ladders.

You're a stepping stone. Clue in and lift yourself up.

Let the girls lift themselves up. Equality is a great thing.

It would be nice to see some women on the Forbes list that didnt get their wealth via divorce or inheritance.


:200:

:135:

:spitcoffee:
I Think
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by I Think »

Although my favorite wife and I have been together for almost 50 years, (and getting closer), I am close to and observing the development of three young lids under 10 yrs old and a 40 yr old and a 50 yr old, who are all victims of split parents.

I say victims because imo the kids are damaged by the split.
The 50 yr old has a very strong need to have people around, cannot handle being alone.

The 40 yr old also has a child from a prior relationship, and sees both sides of the issues both as a now remarried parent and as a single parent. The 40 yr old second guesses every parenting move, and is accused of trying to poison the child against the departed spouse.

The child of that relationship is driven to be as compliant as possible, does not want to upset anyone,
The half sibling in the same family also of course from a split relationship has incredibly strong temper tantrums if anything interferes with, or tries to get any compliance whatsoever, and the parents at least one of whom is from a split relationship fear taking a firm stand to get the youngster to stop the tantrums.

The third child who is from a split, with one very dysfunctional drug addicted parent is very cloying, and wants to take care of people.

Splitting the foundation of any childs emotional needs is a severe blow for their emotional development to adjust to.
It matters little which parent was the cause of the split, it is almost always due to both parties in part, but the effects of divorce are very difficult for the kids.

As a species we need to reconfigure our breeding, and probably need to wait until after the honeymoon.
Problem with being stupid is, you don't know you're stupid
laura66
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by laura66 »

nepal wrote:.
The effects of parental Divorce on children are wide-ranging and everlasting for those children. Divorce should consider the impact on the children, and less about the narcissistic gratification of the parents. Divorce is an experiment gone wrong. Family and the benefits of strong families, needs to become important again. Make family a priority, even if it means giving up other things that one or both parents feel they want.
.
"Once you have children, it's not about you anymore".

:130:

"To raise a child, it sometimes takes a village......but sometimes that village should shut up and mind their own business!"
liisgo
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by liisgo »

And here we are today, 25 yrs after the government of the day studied and designed a plan to assist with the children and parents of split families after divorce. Senator Ann Cools published, "for the sake of the children", designed it, studied it, tabled it to the government of the day. Then mysteriously, like some force shut down any changes that would change the horrible, damaging system Canada has in place. Who, we can guess who. Not one recommendation was put into place from that report.
It appears the courts and society like to use all the social reasoning, gender based differences, accountabilities to support divorce outcomes, who gets custody, still today.
When there is support, advantage to something people want they gladly move to tactics that benefit, a group, or in this case a gender. So funny how quick differences between a group, or in this case, a gender, tactics to support indifferences between 2 are brought to the table as justification to support a certain outcome,,,,,or should we say,,,privilege .
Yes, men, it is a massive risk you take, is it worth the try? The numbers are what they are. The proof of outcome are there for everyone to see.
Is it going to change to be equal, fair, for the "sake of the children". Not a chance for a long time.
I Think
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by I Think »

People should not stay in a bad releationship because of the kids.
People should not breed until they are rock solid certain about their relationship.
Of course we are not going to see that in this universe, too many hormones overpowering too few brain cells.
Problem with being stupid is, you don't know you're stupid
Even Steven
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by Even Steven »

No good marriage ends in divorce.
stuphoto
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Re: Children of Divorced Parents.

Post by stuphoto »

I grew up in a broken home, at a time when few others did.
Yes I am flawed, but so is everyone else I grew up with whom is still alive.

If my mom hadn't kicked my step father out of the house ( her second and last husband ) I would probably have been dead long ago.
He was a 6'2" 220lb firefighter that seemed to enjoy beating up his 75lb stepson ( me )

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