Anthony Bourdain suicide

[Gixxer]

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/katie-hu ... 72519.html

Suicide is a decision made out of desperation, hopelessness, isolation and loneliness. The black hole that is clinical depression is all-consuming. Feeling like a burden to loved ones, feeling like there is no way out, feeling trapped and feeling isolated are all common among people who suffer from depression.

People who say that suicide is selfish always reference the survivors. It’s selfish to leave children, spouses and other family members behind, so they say. They’re not thinking about the survivors, or so they would have us believe. What they don’t know is that those very loved ones are the reason many people hang on for just one more day. They do think about the survivors, probably up until the very last moment in many cases. But the soul-crushing depression that envelops them leaves them feeling like there is no alternative. Like the only way to get out is to opt out. And that is a devastating thought to endure.

Until you’ve stared down that level of depression, until you’ve lost your soul to a sea of emptiness and darkness... you don’t get to make those judgments. You might not understand it, and you are certainly entitled to your own feelings, but making those judgments and spreading that kind of negativity won’t help the next person. In fact, it will only hurt others.

[Gixxer]

http://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/visions/sui ... cidal-mind

There is constant conflict between my depression and my will to live. One moment I am at high risk of falling victim to suicide, and the next moment I am rationalizing my worth as a human being. This has continued for three decades. My illness has hospitalized me on several occasions. I have survived vicious self-mutilations. Spending time in an alcohol detox centre lost me my career with the federal government.

When I'm in my depression, darkness is my life. Thoughts swirl around me, and I am engulfed by despair. My battered mind and soul are confused and weakened, unable to fight off dark thoughts. The only glimmer of hope is that death will finally bring the peace I so desperately seek. I'm supposed to be able to wipe these thoughts out of my mind just by ignoring them—but this is not as easy as it sounds, when suicide feels like the only option for relief.

Detachment from life is all I know. I have no feelings of happiness or sadness. Disconnection with reality has left me in a zombie state of mind. Life passes me by without any recollection. The only things I believe to be real are my tears. Loneliness from the outside world is my sanctuary because within my own darkness, I am safe from the outside.

I need energy to fight a battle that seems impossible to win—the battle for my life. The constant fight and resistance leaves me mortally wounded. The battles make me weary. My body can only take so much abuse. Desperately I seek other methods of relief—alcohol provides temporary respite from the misery, clouds of intoxication briefly numb the pain.

Exhaustion is overwhelming and can only be relieved by resting during the day. The mind and body feel beaten. Self-esteem is destroyed due to an inability to perform the simplest of tasks. The eating and inactivity cause weight gain. The body fat around my waist pushes me further into the abyss. Failures in life compound upon each other, paving the road toward suicide. While in a depression, nothing seems to go right; failure is the only thing I am sure of.

Other people cannot understand how some of us can even think of suicide. But to me it seems to be the most logical method of escaping a life that is not life. Minds and souls are destroyed and life is really not life without them. There seems to be no difference between life and death, since we already feel as though we are dead. This is why death is not a fearful prospect. We have been there, done that. Death is not a stranger to us; that's why it calls out for us. And we are so tired. We just want some peace. Somehow, it all has to end.

If this darkness is so devastating, then why am I still alive? There is one reason I have put up with this relentless hell: I love my wife. Suicide would be like killing two people. The stress of financial hardship and the family affairs she would have to deal with on her own would become her doom. It's my feelings for her that have stopped me from killing myself. That, and I want to feel life again...

Coda
It's difficult to write about depression when you are totally recovered. Your thoughts and feelings about life are not the same as they were when you were ill. Your thought process is totally different. I have been sober for four months now and my mental health is stabilized. I have walked through the threshold to a whole new world. For the first time in 30 years, I've started to discover things that have been buried inside me. I now have goals and dreams to conquer, but most of all, I have hope. I feel my life is important enough to fight for. My fight for survival has been a very long one, and I am willing to continue the fight.

[Fancy]

There is still obviously a stigma and ignorance surrounding suicide and mental illness. Bourdain was of old school thinking - "pull up your bootstraps" and was in a dark mood days before he took his life. It's unfortunate he wasn't following his doctor's orders according to reports but I haven't read what those orders were. People with depression need to be able to count on their loved ones around them and it's hardly helpful to call people selfish when they are suffering so much.

[normaM]

" Who cares aboit the loser who kills themself"
clearly you did to post his story.
But since you mention ignorance... yes, yes that is an ignorant remark, not surprised however.

[Silverstarqueen]

So, is suicide a selfish act? I used to think so. It’s true, many years ago I, too, used to think suicide was a selfish act, especially if children were involved… then I entered the mental health field. Boy, was I wrong. Really wrong. Now, as I sit with patients who are passively or actively suicidal, I can tell you many of them see it not as a selfish act, but as a selfless act, a way to unburden their loved ones. Some adult men have referenced it as a way to finanically save their family, others as a way to end chronic pain, and many, many teens (countless at this point) verbalize it as a way to relieve their parents of the shame and embarrassment they believe they have brought upon their families by their mistakes, bad decisions, or inability to achieve success in academics or sports.

'
https://abovethelaw.com/2018/06/suicide ... lfish-act/

Ask the loved ones if they are unburdened by a family member or loved one kills themselves.
It may be a way to end chronic pain, presuming that massive doses of pain medication has been tried and failed.
If families are telling teens that their depressive behavior or lack of success, etc is an embarassment, perhaps that would be a good topic for psychotherapy, because that would be a hell of a reason for someone to kill themselves, surely we have a good argument against that type of reasoning.
Sorry some folks may agree that these are acceptable reasons for someone to basically abandon their parental duties by killing themselves, I don't. We are buying in to the mental illness itself if we say, Yes, these are good reasons to kill yourself."

[Fancy]

We are buying in to the mental illness itself if we say, Yes, these are good reasons to kill yourself."

Who in their right mind has ever said these are good reasons to kill themselves? No one I know except bullies to suicidal people.

[GordonH]

Ask the loved ones if they are unburdened by a family member or loved one kills themselves.
It may be a way to end chronic pain, presuming that massive doses of pain medication has been tried and failed.
If families are telling teens that their depressive behavior or lack of success, etc is an embarassment, perhaps that would be a good topic for psychotherapy, because that would be a hell of a reason for someone to kill themselves, surely we have a good argument against that type of reasoning.
Sorry some folks may agree that these are acceptable reasons for someone to basically abandon their parental duties by killing themselves, I don't. We are buying in to the mental illness itself if we say, Yes, these are good reasons to kill yourself."

If that loved one (vast majority do) showed signs that suicide is possibility, and family did nothing to seek out help for there so called loved one. Instead told that person to pull up their boot straps & get it together, impo they (the family) are guilty in the person suicide.
Many will be upset with want I just wrote, sorry the truth hurts. Those signs I mentioned is that person screaming out please help me, unfortunately some people ignore or just don't see it for what it is... A cry for help the only way they can in darkness they are currently in.

That's okay, continue to turn a blinds eye & call the person who committed suicide a selfish person (or worse).

[Silverstarqueen]

A family might know or might not know how to get help for their family member. But even if they did go to that person's doctor, and suggeste they needed serious help, there is not much that they can do, not much the doctor can do either. If you call the police and say someone is possibly suicidal, or very depressed, there is not much they can do about it either. So yes, families need to try to help, even if they have no idea, or the wrong idea of how to do that (they are not mental health professionals). But holding them responsible for a person's suicide , the person's therapist is not held responsible, why would the family who has no expertise whatsoever as to what they are supposed to say or do?

[GordonH]

A family might know or might not know how to get help for their family member. But even if they did go to that person's doctor, and suggeste they needed serious help, there is not much that they can do, not much the doctor can do either. If you call the police and say someone is possibly suicidal, or very depressed, there is not much they can do about it either. So yes, families need to try to help, even if they have no idea, or the wrong idea of how to do that (they are not mental health professionals). But holding them responsible for a person's suicide , the person's therapist is not held responsible, why would the family who has no expertise whatsoever as to what they are supposed to say or do?

I guess they can sit on there hands & do nothing then, see how that works (of course it always better to try, then do nothing)
As for the doctor, don't be going to a family practitioner bypass that go straight for psychiatrist.

[Fancy]

Having a support system that believes help is available instead of sweeping the issue under a rug is a great step in helping the one that is having suicidal thoughts. Believing someone is selfish does nothing but hurt the one afflicted with mental illness. The "selfish" tag does not start with a death. There are so many stories of those that continuously try to overcome the despair that it is puzzling why so many don't understand what is at stake. The thought processes aren't the same. Even a GP can help by being positive and willing to devote time to prescribe medications that are helpful and follow up on a schedule to make sure dosage and type of medication is appropriate. When others start labelling people that can't take it anymore shows a lack of understanding the true nature of mental illness and that hurts others that are trying to get themselves out of the depths of despair. Where's the compassion and empathy?

[Silverstarqueen]

Having a support system that believes help is available instead of sweeping the issue under a rug is a great step in helping the one that is having suicidal thoughts. Believing someone is selfish does nothing but hurt the one afflicted with mental illness. The "selfish" tag does not start with a death. There are so many stories of those that continuously try to overcome the despair that it is puzzling why so many don't understand what is at stake. The thought processes aren't the same. Even a GP can help by being positive and willing to devote time to prescribe medications that are helpful and follow up on a schedule to make sure dosage and type of medication is appropriate. When others start labelling people that can't take it anymore shows a lack of understanding the true nature of mental illness and that hurts others that are trying to get themselves out of the depths of despair. Where's the compassion and empathy?

You can try to twist my statements into something I didn't say, but that doesn't change what I said.
I did not say someone is selfish if they are afflicted by mental illness.
If someone is continuously trying to overcome despair: also not selfish.
A GP can certainly help (sometimes) by being positive and willing to prescribe medications (unfortunately rarely offering with which they are not qualified for, and will require a referal (again psychiatrists are in very short supply).
I don't know, what label are you putting on people who can't take it any more? (I did not put any label on them).
Again how does not labelling those with mental illness (because I did not do that) hurt those who are trying to get out of despair?

[Fancy]

You can try to twist my statements into something I didn't say, but that doesn't change what I said.

I didn't quote you and didn't follow you so I didn't twist anything.

[normaM]

Try really hard to listen to what people say. Think they wanna talk to a hotline? No
As for Mountain Man and his insulting " who cares about the Losers"
I care
go crawl back into your hole
Actually go report my post
You are a effing dik

[Gixxer]

Silverstarqueen have you personally suffered from depression or mental illness? ?

[Jflem1983]

Problem is these quack shrinks . Need to justify their reason for being. As a result. Anyone could go in and be diagnosed with something. Heck i was like 7 years old the school councilor tried to get me on meds. She had zero training to make that call. Anyways i outfoxed them. Meds free.