Brother Jake: How the Mormon Church is true

[Donald G]

To Janalta ...

How about you have all of the wives in the afterlife and I get them on earth?? Fair trade??

[janalta]

To Janalta ...

How about you have all of the wives in the afterlife and I get them on earth?? Fair trade??

I'm afraid that would make me a lesbian, thus nullifying my admission to super VIP Heaven...or to the church in general.
And, women are only allowed to be sealed to one man....no polygamy for us
So, no deal. Sorry.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOAdICt ... Ta2opvgd7M

[Donald G]

To Janalta ...

Will some of the Mormon wives serve as one of the seven virgins promised to Muslim males in the hereafter by Allah?? Who gets precedence over the women in VIP Heaven, between Brother Jake's people and Allah's people ??

[Able]

A flying pig led the Mormon leader to the golden tablets in the desert. He immediately scooped them up ,jumped on a unicorn,and took them back to his followers.

[I Think]

Got tired of reading thro this *bleep* to find the three wives bit, but it is a well known teaching of the con man smith.

55 But if she will not abide this commandment, then shall my servant Joseph do all things for her, even as he hath said; and I will bless him and multiply him and give unto him an hundred-fold in this world, of fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, houses and lands, wives and children, and crowns of eternal lives in the eternal worlds.

61 And again, as pertaining to the law of the priesthood—if any man espouse a virgin, and desire to espouse another, and the first give her consent, and if he espouse the second, and they are virgins, and have vowed to no other man, then is he justified; he cannot commit adultery for they are given unto him; for he cannot commit adultery with that that belongeth unto him and to no one else.

62 And if he have ten virgins given unto him by this law, he cannot commit adultery, for they belong to him, and they are given unto him; therefore is he justified.

[janalta]

To Janalta ...

Will some of the Mormon wives serve as one of the seven virgins promised to Muslim males in the hereafter by Allah?? Who gets precedence over the women in VIP Heaven, between Brother Jake's people and Allah's people ??

Nope.

You mean Brother Joseph, right ? The Mormon 'prophet'.
Brother Jake is an ex-Mormon who publishes satirical Mormon podcasts on youtube. Although, arguably, he'd make a much more moral, ethical and honest prophet that Joseph Smith.

First of all, if she was a wife here on earth, chances are that she's not a virgin.

Secondly, there aren't any Muslims in Mormon heaven. Well, not in the top level, special VIP heaven anyhow.
You see, when you die you don't go directly to heaven. You go to a sort of heaven waiting room.
The really bad people - like - homosexuals and apostates, are sent to outer darkness - the Mormon version of hell. ( without the whole fire, brimstone and Satan thing)
The super dedicated, obedient top notch temple worthy Mormons who have never done anything against the doctrines and covenants - ever, get to go directly to the top level of Super VIP heaven in the Celestial Kingdom. Here they get to become gods themselves and populate their own planets and make spirit children for all eternity to populate that planet with.
Only about 10% of Mormons are good enough for this one.

Anyhow, the rest of us non-perfect humans have to go to the waiting room.

If you were already a Mormon when you died, you'll get to go on to the Celestial Kingdom right away- as long as you never lied, masturbated, had sex before marriage, drank alcohol, smoked pot, drank coffee or tea - or any other hot beverage - except hot chocolate, that one's ok...I think. And, of course, you'd have to be up to date on your tithing. And, you have to be a man, unless you're a married woman and your husband wants you to come along with him.
Oh, before you go, you have to spend a little time being a missionary or teacher - to help the poor lost souls stranded in the waiting room.

There's the catch, well, one of them. In order to leave the waiting room you have to become a Mormon if you weren't one here on earth. But, you're dead...so...no problem, you just wait for a living Mormon to baptize you.
Once the spirits who were Mormons before they died teach you all about the church, gospel, BOM...and you accept it as truth, and are baptized - you will get to head to the Terrestrial Kingdom. It's a cool place, just not as cool as the Celestial Kingdom.
It's actually not even in heaven, it's here on earth, just, well, in another way cooler, less stressful dimension.

The really bad dudes have to go to the third kingdom - the Telestial kingdom.
These are the people who refuse to believe and accept the teachings of the gospel, even when they are being given a chance again in the waiting room. These are the liars, murderers, adulterers, thieves...and basically kind of just laughed off god's commandments when they were alive.

So....you see, Brother Joseph's people and Allah's people won't be in the same Kingdom - so no sharing of wives or virgins.
Brother Joseph's people get ALL the women. Well, except the ones who don't make the cut. I suppose the Muslims get those ones. Maybe some of them will be virgins ?

[janalta]

Got tired of reading thro this *bleep* to find the three wives bit, but it is a well known teaching of the con man smith.

55 But if she will not abide this commandment, then shall my servant Joseph do all things for her, even as he hath said; and I will bless him and multiply him and give unto him an hundred-fold in this world, of fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, houses and lands, wives and children, and crowns of eternal lives in the eternal worlds.

61 And again, as pertaining to the law of the priesthood—if any man espouse a virgin, and desire to espouse another, and the first give her consent, and if he espouse the second, and they are virgins, and have vowed to no other man, then is he justified; he cannot commit adultery for they are given unto him; for he cannot commit adultery with that that belongeth unto him and to no one else.

62 And if he have ten virgins given unto him by this law, he cannot commit adultery, for they belong to him, and they are given unto him; therefore is he justified.

Ah, but, those are referring to life here on earth - when he decided to bring in Polygamy.

The problem was, he didn't actually follow his own rules, er, god's rules, that were given to him.

His first wife, Emma, did not give consent to any of his plural wives - especially the first ten or so, because, he kind of forgot to tell her about them. oops.

And, he married women who were already married to other men, therefore, not virgins.

[Farmmaa]

In their own twisted way, I think the LDS church has actually done these kids a huge favor. By the time these kids are 18 years old and can see how the church has treated their parents, they're not going to want to be anywhere near it.
I just hope it doesn't destroy too many families in the mean time.

Come to think of it, all children should be given the same advantage in waiting until they are 18 before being baptised.
The church has decided that by the age of 8, a child is old enough to be accountable for their own decisions and choices in life. Yes, 8 year olds.

Basic religious indoctrination aside, these children have no idea what they are actually agreeing to.
According to LDS preparatory information, here a few samples of what they 8 year olds are being forced to promise to the church:
Pray daily
Teach the gospel to others
Pay full tithe
Live by the Word of Wisdom
Law of chastity

Here's what that entails -
-Giving 10% of all earnings, wages, monetary gifts, inheritances, etc to the church. For the rest of your life, no matter what your economical situation may be.
- Never flirt with the opposite sex
- Avoid ever being alone with a member of the opposite sex
- Complete chastity until after marriage
- No pornographic material of any kind
- No masturbation, ever. Masturbation is a sin, a perversion. It is a selfish, immoral act.
- Seek only clean, uplifting, pure sources of entertainment ( only G rated movies, Tv shows, magazines, books and music )
- Choose only friends who encourage you to fulfill your eternal goals ( so, only LDs friends )
- Stay away from pornography, immorality, sexual temptations, impure thoughts, gambling, tobacco, alcohol and drugs.
- Keep yourself worthy to enter the temple.

8 year olds don't even know what most of those things are or what they mean, let alone being competent to promise to adhere to them for the rest of their lives

[Glacier]

In their own twisted way, I think the LDS church has actually done these kids a huge favor. By the time these kids are 18 years old and can see how the church has treated their parents, they're not going to want to be anywhere near it.

Mormons are the most likely to keep the faith when they grow up. JWs are the least likely, hence their next generation is mostly new converts.

[Farmmaa]

Mormons are the most likely to keep the faith when they grow up. JWs are the least likely, hence their next generation is mostly new converts.

Not so much any more.
An estimated 50% of returned missionaries are now leaving the church , this from a speaker at BYU.

The advent of the internet and access to information outside of approved church material is enlightening a lot of members today, especially the younger generation.
There's just too many questionable events, doctrines, historical events, etc to be ignored and shelves are breaking in large numbers.

[Glacier]

Not so much any more.
An estimated 50% of returned missionaries are now leaving the church , this from a speaker at BYU.

That's pretty low. With JWs it's like 80 to 90%.

[Farmmaa]

The Catholic Church has also seen about an 80% decrease in youth membership

Remember though, the 50% that the LDS admits to only includes returning missionaries - not the general population.
The majority of younger Mormons are not going to be leaving the church as soon as they reach the legal age - because of BYU.
The university announced recently, in no uncertain terms, that inactive students or students who resign from the church will forfeit their education and be expelled from the school. They will withhold degrees for those who have recently completed their studies and refuse to release transcripts for students who want to transfer.
So, one can expect that people are not going to publicly or officially leave the church until they have their degree in hand.

Membership numbers also do not realistically reflect actual active members.
Even if you resign, your name is still in their books and in their numbers.
Also counted as members are those who are actively - inactive.
Add in the millions who were baptised by missionaries and the never actually attended the church again once the missionaries left their country, and their overinflated 15 million is ridiculously inaccurate as far as actual practising members go.

Overall, young people are leaving religion in numbers higher than ever before in history.

[Farmmaa]

These stats show that although LDS claims a membership of 15.3 million, the actual number of active, church going members is more in the ballpark of 4.6 million.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LRaBdUojWT0/V ... raphic.png

http://www.mormonism101.com/p/infographics.html

[Donald G]

The truth is what tends to defeat most religions. Look at how people today view the Mythical Roman Gods of early history.

[Farmmaa]

The truth is what tends to defeat most religions. Look at how people today view the Mythical Roman Gods of early history.

Logically, one would assume that to be the case, but Mormons seem to defy logic.
The church is based upon lie and after lie, passed from one con man to the next. The BOM and the Book of Abraham have been historically proven to be false. The so called prophets have proven themselves to be untrustworthy, adulterers, cons, bigots. Not one of these men who supposedly can speak directly to god has had a divine revelation for more than 100 years.
And yet, believers still choose to follow them.
Intelligent, well educated members somehow still manage to defend their actions - because even if it makes no sense, god will have the answers once you die.
They 'know' it is all true because, the spirit. Even though every other religion also claims to know they are true based on the same feelings - the 'burning in the bosom'.

They are not interested in the truth. It's easier and more comfortable to just continue to play along with the lies.