Things that make you say Hmmm

[Catz]

So...just to throw this out there...

Lets say a man sleeps with another woman...he is married.
Then another, etc, etc, etc...who knows how many.
Say this goes on for years.

Then he gets caught, and is forced to tell his wife, or the other person will.

So he does.
They are very religious people.

Now she wants to do the right thing and forgive him....

I heard this a bit ago, and cannot stop thinking about what I would do if it were me....

I thought it would be interesting to get the 'religious' point of view, as I follow my personnal beliefs and do not go to church...hmmmmm

[AlanH]

If I were a woman, I would take him for everything he owns, in an end of times financial Armageddon, which is about as religious as that would get.

Then I would get a license plate that says WUZ-H1Z, to put on his car, that is now owned by me.

And lastly, trade up and get a real man.

[Catz]

I find it very interesting...I know what I would do, but how do you give support to someone who is following the church beliefs, and you think...what the heck are you thinking? Kick his a$$ out...

[zzontar]

If God always forgave, there wouldn't be a Hell.

[gardengirl]

So...just to throw this out there...

Lets say a man sleeps with another woman...he is married.
Then another, etc, etc, etc...who knows how many.
Say this goes on for years.

Then he gets caught, and is forced to tell his wife, or the other person will.

So he does.
They are very religious people.

Now she wants to do the right thing and forgive him....

I heard this a bit ago, and cannot stop thinking about what I would do if it were me....

I thought it would be interesting to get the 'religious' point of view, as I follow my personnal beliefs and do not go to church...hmmmmm

They are very religious people? Errrr, yeah.
Which concepts should we go with?
Turn the other cheek...
Or
Do unto others...
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife...
Oh, and what was that one about adultery?

I don't think it is up to the wife to forgive the guy. That is between him and his conscience.
From the sounds of it, he doesn't have one.

Instead of being guilted into giving him another chance, she needs to look after herself.
If he has been a serial adulterer, there is no reason to think he will change. He has no respect for his wife and no respect for marriage.

Cut your losses and move on.

The Lord helps those who help themselves.

[Captain Awesome]

I thought this thread will be about actual things that make you say "Hmmm".
Like yawning.

[Catz]

So...just to throw this out there...

Lets say a man sleeps with another woman...he is married.
Then another, etc, etc, etc...who knows how many.
Say this goes on for years.

Then he gets caught, and is forced to tell his wife, or the other person will.

So he does.
They are very religious people.

Now she wants to do the right thing and forgive him....

I heard this a bit ago, and cannot stop thinking about what I would do if it were me....

I thought it would be interesting to get the 'religious' point of view, as I follow my personnal beliefs and do not go to church...hmmmmm

They are very religious people? Errrr, yeah.
Which concepts should we go with?
Turn the other cheek...
Or
Do unto others...
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife...
Oh, and what was that one about adultery?

I don't think it is up to the wife to forgive the guy. That is between him and his conscience.
From the sounds of it, he doesn't have one.

Instead of being guilted into giving him another chance, she needs to look after herself.
If he has been a serial adulterer, there is no reason to think he will change. He has no respect for his wife and no respect for marriage.

Cut your losses and move on.

The Lord helps those who help themselves.

I know. I am baffled. So I think they want to follow the 'faith' and forgive...she does...for the kids...it's better for them if they stay together. I just want to pull my hair out. I would never do that to mine, but then again, I follow my own beliefs. That's why I put it in here. I don't think I could go to a church and believe in some of this. Exactly how do you forgive your spouse for sleeping with others for years????? What does it teach your children?????

[Phoenix Within]

If God always forgave, there wouldn't be a Hell.

God does forgive,the problem is that people don't follow the rules. According to Christian doctrine, you need to be repentant to be forgiven. Too many Christians (or at least a good percentage of the one's I've come across) treat this as a "get out of Hell" free card and conveniently forget the repentance part. Always read the fine print.

As for the original post, yes you're supposed to forgive, but to me that doens't mean that you have to have anything to do with the person afterwards! One indescretion is tough and a blow to any relationship but humans make mistakes (not that I'm condoning it!). Years of it? That's a problem!

[Jo]

Does she love him? Will her life be better without him? If she says she wants to forgive him, and clearly he is asking to stay in the marriage, then I see some hope for the marriage. It wouldn't be easy, but neither would the alternative be easy.

[Aluminium]

I love all these things people say God does. How much money would he actually have to give the church to make it back into heaven? You sheep are so fooled by people telling you about what god wants you to do. Would she forgive him if God told her to make up her own mind?

[kgcayenne]

What she does in her marriage is her business---religiously-based or not. If she chooses to stay with him then that's her decision. Even though people who love her disagree, they have no say... and something tells me that they far from are willing to support her both emotionally and financially for the long-term should she leave.

Therefore it is best to either put up or shut up, because I guarantee you don't know all the facts that are laid out behind closed doors.

[Catz]

Interesting comments. I have always believed that my opinion is just that, mine. I think the problem is trying to provide her with support on issue that struggles and bothers me. I have to remind myself that I am not in that situation, and role is to provide support. It is hard to do for me, on this one. She is an amazing person, and I am just not sure on the religion aspects of it as pointed out. It has been an interesting sole searching experience for me, in which I am having a hard time.


ETA...sorry...what does repented mean?

[Catz]

What she does in her marriage is her business---religiously-based or not. If she chooses to stay with him then that's her decision. Even though people who love her disagree, they have no say... and something tells me that they far from are willing to support her both emotionally and financially for the long-term should she leave.

Therefore it is best to either put up or shut up, because I guarantee you don't know all the facts that are laid out behind closed doors.

She has good family support, and money is not an issue.
I want to be to understand the situation better.

[Glacier]

ETA...sorry...what does repented mean?

Your the only that used that word so far, so why don't you tell us? Or do you mean repentant? GOOGLE.

It means you realize what your doing is wrong, and you change your ways. In the words of Leonard Cohen...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D97OxHZzBeQ

[Catz]

yup, can't spell